


burning underwater

by wooyoungthighs



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Alternate Universe - Office, Anal Sex, CEO Im Jaebum | JB, Dirty Talk, Hand Jobs, M/M, Office Blow Jobs, Office Sex, eventually i swear, i've been writing this for so long help, jinyoung is maybe a little bit pathetic, markson is only background, maybe slow burn, no beta we die like women, yugbam if you squint really hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-01
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:14:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 32,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22976752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wooyoungthighs/pseuds/wooyoungthighs
Summary: Jaebum slowly took a step forward until he was barely a foot away from him. “Do you think it was a mistake?”Jinyoung took a while to answer, now hyper-aware of their proximity and the electricity in the air. He wondered if Jaebum could hear his heartbeat. “I’m not sure.”“God,” Jaebum muttered. “You’re so cold I could burn myself.”orThe timing was wrong for Jinyoung and Jaebum, but when Jinyoung gets a new job it almost feels like a second chance.
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung, Mark Tuan/Jackson Wang
Comments: 57
Kudos: 283





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So after two years and two username changes, I finally got back into writing and!!! This is it, folks. I have written most of this fic already and I have maybe only one chapter left to finish, so I'm gonna figure out some kind of schedule to release the chapters. I'm thinking maybe once every two weeks, but I'll see depending on the reactions. So far my estimate is 7 chapters.
> 
> Also, I don't have a beta (yet?) and I'm not a native english speaker, so if you see any mistakes then go easy on me lol (but you can tell me in the comments, especially if it's a reocurring mistake).

Jinyoung didn’t think it could get any worse. He didn't have a job, his lease was terminated because of reconstruction, and worst of all: he was painfully single while all his friends from college were already in serious relationships.

The college days were over and Jinyoung could not just work in a coffee shop for the rest of his life. But finding a full-time job was hard and although his college degree pointed towards it, Jinyoung found himself hating the idea of spending his entire life as a nobody in a massive corporation, blending in with other nobodies in suits.

But his lease was already running out and it did not help him in any way that he had already failed about ten job interviews. His motivation was also running thin and with each resume he sent out, his standards for a good job lowered. It concerned him that maybe one day he would settle for washing the dishes and that his career had already peaked when he was making coffee at Starbucks.

“If you go live with me you can relax,” Jackson told him over take-out dinner on the evening after Jinyoung’s thirteenth job interview. “It’s not a big deal, really. I can sustain us both for a few months and I always wanted a sugar baby,” he added with a wink and Jinyoung rolled his eyes and laughed.

“No, I can’t do that to you,” Jinyoung declined, looking into his bowl of food. Jackson had offered him to move in a few times already. His apartment was big, he had one spare room he used as an office and Jinyoung knew that he had a lot of money since he worked under his father’s protection in a pretty big company.

“So you’d rather end up on the street?” Jackson said with a hint of disappointment and even anger. Jinyoung sighed.

“No…” he replied. “Listen, you know I appreciate it, but  _ this _ ...” he looked around Jackson’s big living room and for a second he let himself live in the thought that he could relax for a while, spend some more time looking for jobs and only start working when he is absolutely satisfied with the job. He couldn’t finish the sentence, lost in the dream.

“Listen,” Jackson said after a minute has passed and Jinyoung still didn’t say anything. “I know it seems like I can’t understand what you’re going through. But I hate seeing you like this and I want to help you. You declined my offer to get you a job where I work, you don’t want to live here until you do find a job, I get it. You don’t even want me to pay for your dinner.” 

Jinyoung finally looked at Jackson’s concerned face and something moved inside of him. Jackson searched for the right words that would finally convince Jinyoung, but it felt like he has already tried everything.

“You know what, let’s go out tonight,” he eventually said and put the last spoonful of rice into his mouth. Jinyoung stared at him, confused, as Jackson stood up to take the dirty dishes to the kitchen. “We haven’t gotten drinks or went clubbing since graduating college,” he shouted from the other room. Then he came back and looked into Jinyoung’s eyes. “And I’m also pretty lonely so we can try to meet some new people, right?”

Jinyoung didn't know what to say to that, but Jackson didn't need an answer. He went to his room and started looking through his closet full of expensive clothes. Jackson was one of the few people he knew that were still single, which enabled the two to hang out so often. He honestly had no idea why he had been single for so long with the wealth and looks he had.  _ If someone like Jackson is still single, is there any hope for me? _ he thought. 

“Do you think this looks good?” Jackson put on an all-black outfit with a leather jacket and Jinyoung nodded.

“Everything looks good on you,” Jinyoung said but Jackson dismissed the compliment. 

“Borrow something from me, if you want,” he told him as Jinyoung was still in a suit that he wore to his job interview.

They walked through a busy street in the city center, looking for a decent bar or a pub. Jinyoung was still not entirely sure whether he wanted to spend the evening drinking, but Jackson seemed excited so he decided to try and not be too miserable. Although it was already dark outside, the autumn was still decently warm so the jacket that Jackson wore and the (probably expensive) hoodie that Jinyoung borrowed were enough to keep the two warm.

“Have you tried dating someone at work?” Jinyoung asked Jackson, back at the topic of dating.

“No, not really,” Jackson replied. “I’m worried about what could happen if I got accused of something. Not to myself, but my dad.”

“He still doesn’t know, right?”  _ That you like men _ .

“Yeah,” Jackson sighed. “What’s worse is his superiors and business partners. So many people get offended by stuff that doesn’t even concern them. So I’m playing it safe.”

Jinyoung nodded, remembering their college days. Jinyoung had not properly dated until college and even then his experiences were limited. He'd met Jackson in his first year and although they were good friends, it was never dating. Jackson helped him with texting boys on dating apps and they went to parties together, hoping to experience something new. But Jinyoung wasn't too fond of one-night stands so he usually just went back to his dorm, while Jackson was making out with someone he had just met. Most of his dating attempts had failed and none of them could have been considered  _ love _ .

_ Well, maybe except… _

Jackson suddenly stopped walking and had to put out an arm to stop Jinyoung too. Jinyoung realized he had completely zoned out and looked around all startled until he realized that he had almost walked into a busy intersection. They were now standing at a red light, their favorite pub just across the street.

“Hey Jinyoung, look,” Jackson said and pointed at a huge screen that was glowing with blinding light. They were currently in a really touristy part of the city and every building was covered with glaring banners and adverts. The huge screen that Jackson was pointing at was currently showing the evening news. 

“Oh god, not this,” Jinyoung sighed to appear nonchalant, but inside his heart dropped. For a moment that felt like an eternity, all of the noise around him combined into static and although the streets were busy that night, he suddenly felt alone. 

_ The heir ascended to the throne: Im Jaebum _

On the screen, there were shots of a man in a fitted suit getting out of a shiny car and walking through a crowd of journalists. Then there was another scene of the same man signing some forms in a room full of other businessmen in fitted suits, however, neither of them was as young and as  _ good looking _ as him. The scene was followed by short clips of the same man from different times to remind the audience of who this very important man was.  _ Im Jaebum becomes the chairman of the Daeim Group at 23 years old _ , read the headline.

“That’s him, right?” Jackson asked in awe, but Jinyoung was not too present in the moment.

Jinyoung was back two years ago, back in college, sitting in front of the room C141. He even knew which classes was Jaebum taking that he himself did not attend. That day, he thought that stars were aligned and that he would finally take the biggest leap of faith. 

_ “Don’t you think this is a little rude?” _ was all he got that day from Jaebum.

“You alright?” Jackson repeated and Jinyoung finally looked at him, back from zoning out.

“I just cringe so much!” Jinyoung complained and put his head into his palms. He let out a whine. Jackson chuckled and put his arm on Jinyoung’s shoulder.

“It’s alright, dude, I’m sure he had already forgotten midst all the… chaebol responsibilities,” Jackson tried to comfort him and Jinyoung looked up at him. For some reason, the thought of Jaebum forgetting didn’t make Jinyoung happier.

“I’m sorry, I think this isn’t a good idea,” he apologized. “The job interview, thinking about my apartment, now this… I should probably go home and get drinks with you some other time.” Jinyoung felt like the most pathetic guy on the planet. How often do you get the face of your ex-crush shown to you on a screen that’s bigger than your apartment? That can only happen to Park Jinyoung, he was sure. 

“No, Jinyoung, don’t…” Jackson interrupted him, putting both of his arms on his shoulders to prevent him from turning around and going home. “Listen, you need this,” he told him when Jinyoung finally met his gaze. “You need to stop thinking about all of the bad stuff, for at least once.”

Jinyoung knew that it would be better for him to spend more time with his friends. He was more afraid of what state he would end up in after drinking under so much stress. And also,  _ Jaebum is not ‘bad stuff’ so I can think about him all I want _ , Jinyoung established in his head before the light finally turned green and he and Jackson started approaching the bar.

  
  
  


Jinyoung woke up to loud ringing next to his right ear. He winced at the sound, lifted his face from the pillow and briefly looked around before falling back into the pillow. 

_ Jackson's spare bedroom. _ Jinyoung sighed in relief. At least some dignity was kept last night.

Then he immediately realized that his phone was actually ringing and that it was not his alarm clock and it definitely was not just a dream. He rolled onto his side and picked up the phone, squinting his eyes.  _ Unknown number. _

_ Did I give some desperate guy my number? _ Jinyoung yelled at himself in his head. He glanced at the room again, noticing that Jackson had already left to work. He thought about it for a couple of seconds, but could not recall giving his number to anyone.

"H– hello?" He eventually picked up the phone, his voice cracking at first. His throat felt sore and Jinyoung hoped it wasn't a cold.

"Hello, this is Daeim Group. Am I speaking to Park Jinyoung?" The man at the other end sounded nice, like if he had all the time in the world to talk to Jinyoung. He quickly glanced at the clock on the wall: it read 1 PM.

"Yes, you are," Jinyoung said, confused. Daeim Group?  _ The Daeim Group? _ "Why?"

A faint memory of last night suddenly came back to him. It was almost midnight and they were sitting at their favorite food stall that served plenty of greasy food, ideal for nights out like these. They were talking about college and relationships. Jinyoung had a vague memory of them going to various web pages of various chaebols and laughing at the ridiculous seriousness of all of them.

"Upon seeing your resume we would be interested in hiring you for a position that had recently been vacated. Would you be interested in a job interview on, let’s say, Monday?"

Jinyoung's breath got stuck in his throat as his mind went completely blank.

"Hello, Mr. Park? Can you still hear me?"

"Yeah," his voice cracked again as he sat up on the bed. "Sorry, yes I can hear you, I just…"  _ don't understand. _

"Is everything alright? I can't hear you properly," the man said, his voice still patient.

"Monday is fine with me," Jinyoung suddenly blurted out in a clear voice, surprised at his own eagerness.

"I'm glad to hear that, Mr. Park," Jinyoung could hear his smile clearly.  _ That has to be a well-paying job for sure _ , he thought. "Is 10 AM fine?"

The rest of the short phone call didn't even feel real to Jinyoung, as he had zoned out already. They had settled on details, but Jinyoung could not stop thinking about how it was even real. He had previously promised to himself that he wouldn't let himself get employed into Daeim, as he knew to which family the conglomerate belonged to. He had promised himself that he wouldn't seek the attention of Im Jaebum again.

As he tapped the red button to end the call, Jinyoung collapsed back onto the bed and rubbed his palms against his face. Then he sat up again to check his emails. There was an invitation to the job interview from Daeim and one rejection letter from the company he had visited the day before. But what Jinyoung was looking for was in the sent mails. 

Between laughing with Jackson at the chaebol websites the night before, Jackson had to make a trip to the nearest public bathroom as there was no bathroom attached to the small stall with fried food. That meant that Jinyoung had maybe five to ten slightly drunk minutes for himself to spend on scrolling social media or to stuff his face with more food. However, on the web page of one specific conglomerate called Daeim there was a picture of the company’s new chairman. Jinyoung first avoided the picture, looking elsewhere on the page, but when Jackson had left him alone he let himself look at it. For a few seconds at first, but then he looked again and his eyes suddenly could not look away from the photo. Im Jaebum was standing in front of a desk in an office, staring right through the phone screen at Jinyoung. It was an objectively very nice picture. Im Jaebum was dressed in a fitted suit, casually leaning against the desk with hands in his pockets. It was an interesting contrast – the relaxed pose collided with Im Jaebum’s gaze and sharp features. Jinyoung suddenly felt like the man in the photo was examining him with utmost attention, so he scrolled past the picture, but the eerie feeling did not leave him.

“Hey, Jinyoung!” Jackson screamed at him from afar, staggering a little bit. Jinyoung flinched, but the email with a resume attached had already been sent. Only after that, the paranoia of being watched left him completely.

Jinyoung found a short note from Jackson on the kitchen island, letting him know which foods he can take from the fridge and have for lunch and also reminding Jinyoung that he can move in with him during the weekend. That immediately made Jinyoung wince, as he realized that he had to officially move out on Monday. Although it did hurt Jinyoung’s pride a little bit, he knew that at the moment he had literally no other option apart from sleeping on the street.

Jinyoung spent the rest of the short afternoon sitting in Jackson’s apartment watching movies. It was not too uncommon for him to stay at Jackson’s apartment without Jackson, and Jackson had never complained as there was plenty of space for both of them, and Jinyoung felt like Jackson was maybe a little happier when he was not all by himself in there.  _ Do I even need a boyfriend? _ he thought for a second, but he was interrupted as Jackson opened the front door.

“Jinyoung?” Jackson said loudly into the apartment to verify that Jinyoung was still there. 

“Hi,” Jinyoung greeted him from the couch, briefly looking over his shoulder to smile at him.

Suddenly Jackson was throwing something in his direction and Jinyoung flinched as the object chimed midst air. He successfully caught it – a small bundle of two keys, a chip, and a small plush bear keyring.

“Is this–?” Jinyoung wanted to ask, but Jackson interrupted him.

“Keys to the apartment. I figured I would get you a pair on my way back home,” Jackson explained, still standing in front of the apartment door. Jinyoung stood up and approached him.

“Thank you so much, Jackson, this means a lot to me,” he said, a little bit awkwardly but sincerely.

“It’s nothing.”

“Why are you still standing there?” Jinyoung asked as Jackson was still in his shoes and jacket.

“Let’s start moving you today,” Jackson said excitedly. “I realized it was almost always you sleeping over and I barely even saw your apartment. So I thought I would help you pack, we would order food and say goodbye to the apartment?”

Jinyoung nodded and smiled, and then smiled even more.

“What happened to you, Park Jinyoung?” Jackson could see right through him.

“What should happen?” Jinyoung denied but couldn’t stop smiling.

“I know you far too well, something good happened, right?”

So Jinyoung explained everything about the job interview as they made their way to his apartment. He could not possibly hide the excitement; still, a part of him had doubts, that he would fail the interview again, that it was way too good to be true. Jackson tried his best to get him out of that mindset, but he himself had found it pretty hard as he knew how improbable it was to get hired into such position without having contacts in the company.

“Do you think you will meet Jaebum?” Jackson asked him as they sat on the floor, carefully packing up Jinyoung’s dishes.

He had thought about that, not just once. “No, I don’t think so,” he replied after a second of thinking. “I did avoid that company because of it, but it is a big conglomerate so I would probably be meeting just the people I would directly work with.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Jackson said, thinking about how few people he is meeting regularly in his job. “Don’t you find it a little bit exciting, though?”

“What? Working in the same company as Jaebum?”

“Well, yes,” Jackson said with a little bit of mischief in his voice. “But I mean, what if you do see him? Doesn’t it feel thrilling, to not know whether you bump into each other? What if you see him on Monday?”

Jinyoung looked up on the ceiling as if the answer was written on it. He thought about the first moment he ever noticed Jaebum. It was in his second year of college and Jinyoung was waiting for a lecture to start. The lecture hall was not open yet so he was leaning against a wall opposite to it. His phone was almost dead, so he just stared into the wall, holding his notebooks. 

And Jaebum was standing right there, talking to someone Jinyoung did not know, his backpack hanging from his shoulder and hands in his pockets. Jaebum was apparently enjoying the conversation with a smile on his face and laughing few times. He was so invested in it that Jinyoung didn't find it weird for himself to look at him, studying his face and guessing what they could be talking about. At that time he stared at him not because Jaebum was good looking, which he definitely was and Jinyoung could clearly see it, but because he could and because he had nothing else to look at. Jinyoung felt like he was in a gallery and the good looking guy in front of him was a piece of art, a statue he could admire.

It has definitely been exciting for Jinyoung to go to his classes, not knowing when would be the next time he would see the other man. He wondered if he feels the same now when he had already failed in his attempt to ask Jaebum out.

“I’m not sure,” he said.

He couldn't deny that he had missed Jaebum.


	2. Chapter 2

Jinyoung could not believe it. He got the job. It scared him how easy it went. When he was asked about how soon he could start working, Jinyoung did not want to seem too desperate so he said next week, but it was the entirety of his last week unemployed that made him terrified of the possibilities of what could happen.

So he decided to spend the week helping out Jackson with errands and cleaning around the apartment, mostly because that was a way to keep his mind occupied for most of the day. He knew that thinking about meeting Jaebum at the company would only set him up for disappointment.

Eventually, it was Monday again. Jinyoung woke up early, maybe a little too early to make himself look presentable on his first day of work. He had only two proper suits that fit him well enough as his previous jobs did not require strict businesswear, but he could not afford a new one until he would get his first paycheck. So instead of wondering too much about what to wear, he spent the morning styling his hair and having breakfast with Jackson. Despite the early hours, everything felt right that morning and after all those unsure weeks Jinyoung finally felt like things were starting to look up.

Jinyoung arrived at the Daeim building at 9 am sharp. As he walked inside into the spacious lobby of the skyscraper he saw Mr. Choi, the same man that interviewed him. He waved at him, maybe slightly more enthusiastically than Jinyoung would have expected.

“Hello, Mr. Park,” he said as Jinyoung approached him and shook his hand. “I thought we could meet here so I could show you around?” Jinyoung nodded. “So this is the lobby, if you have guests or business partners you meet them here, don’t send anyone up by themselves.” Mr. Choi gestured with his hand to his left side. “This is probably the most important, this way is the coffee shop and the canteen, although our office usually orders lunch or we go out to eat.”

Jinyoung patiently listened to Mr. Choi explaining every little detail about the area that he started to doubt that he would ever need this much insight on just the ground floor of the entire building. Then they proceeded to set up Jinyoung’s employee card and after that, they finally headed up to the office. Jinyoung barely even got to speak as Mr. Choi talked for most of the time. In a way, he was relieved that the kindness in his voice was not just a front put up for customers and business partners, he actually talked like that to everyone.

Jinyoung was surprised to find out the office was on the top floor. There was maybe about fifteen people sitting at their desks, everyone dressed really well which only made Jinyoung insecure about his suit that he got out of clearance. He was introduced first to the receptionist, a young man Kim Yugyeom who seemed to be barely the age to be working full time. But he seemed to be friendly and talkative, which was a good sign.

“So, most of the work we’re doing here is focused around the top management,” Mr. Choi explained as they walked around the office. Not many employees paid attention to them, briefly looking up from their computers at most. “But don’t be surprised if you get assigned something more… personal matters of the boss. Like last year I was sorting out his taxes,” he chuckled, rolling his eyes a little bit. “It is the job description of this position, but the new boss doesn’t assign us too much of personal stuff yet. So maybe as he gets more used to it…”

“Excuse me,” Jinyoung interrupted him and Mr. Choi looked at him, startled. “This might be bold, but who is the boss?” 

“Oh! I didn’t tell you during our interview?” Mr. Choi said, taken aback. Jinyoung shook his head. “Well, it is _the boss_.”

Jinyoung looked at him, still confused. Or _did_ he know, but didn’t want to guess in case he was wrong? _The clues were all there._

“ _The new chairman_ ,” Mr. Choi said like if Jinyoung just asked if water was wet. “Im Jaebum.”

 _Oh._ “Oh,” he said, trying to act nonchalant. Like if his head did not just explode.

“So, this is your desk,” Mr. Choi said as they approached a table with nothing but a computer and an empty file. She then introduced him to the person sitting at a desk next to him. His name was Mark Tuan and he spared him barely any attention, shaking his hand and then immediately sitting back down to work. Thinking he was not being paid any attention to, he then briefly but thoroughly looked Jinyoung up and down. To Jinyoung it felt like a threat.

“And this desk opposite to you is mine,” Mr. Choi smiled at Jinyoung with a hint of excitement.

Jinyoung was confused. At one hand the office seemed to be warm and welcoming with Mr. Choi smiling constantly. Later he had few other people come up to him and introduce themselves, trying to strike up a conversation. He was even offered a cup of coffee from one of them. But then there was Mark Tuan who sat directly next to him and seemed to be perceiving Jinyoung as a competition. And of course, _Im Jaebum_ . Jinyoung shuddered at the thought of eventually meeting and _working_ with him, for him. He was both anxious and eager to see him and the thought of quitting just because of that was appealing. But then he remembered he had virtually no money so there was nothing left for him to do but to bite the bullet and power through at least his first day of work. _Then I can consult this with Jackson_.

“So, how did you get this job,” his desk-neighbour, Mark Tuan, asked him in the break room during lunch. Jinyoung was taken aback by this – how should he have gotten the job?

“What do you mean?”

“I suppose you knew Youngjae from earlier?”

Jinyoung was still lost, but suddenly Mr. Choi appeared next to him.

“Mr. Park has the same exact qualifications as Kyungseok had,” he smiled at both of them brightly.

“Well, I hope you like it here,” Mark Tuan looked at Jinyoung, then at Mr. Choi and excused himself to go back to work.

“Mark is pretty competitive,” Mr. Choi said as an apology.

“It’s alright,” Jinyoung said absentmindedly, still following Mark with his gaze.

“By the way, you can call me Youngjae,” Mr. Choi said after a moment and Jinyoung finally looked at him. He introduced himself with his given name and realized how much more comfortable he suddenly felt, not being called ‘Mr. Park’ anymore.

“What happened to the guy before me?” Jinyoung asked suddenly feeling overcome with a sense of familiarity.

“Ah, Kyungseok. He rage quit after the change in management,” Youngjae said as if he was asked what he did on the weekend. He smiled at him, holding a cup of tea in his hands. “You applied for the job before it was even settled that he will be let go. You were lucky.” Jinyoung didn’t say anything but he couldn’t help himself but stare at him, eyes wide in surprise. “Or maybe it was a sign from the universe?” Youngjae raised his eyebrows playfully and looked at him in a way that Jinyoung was not able to decipher. Then he chuckled and turned around to go back to his desk.

Shortly after lunch, there was an announcement from the young receptionist, Kim Yugyeom. He asked everyone to attend a group meeting with the chairman, which naturally startled Jinyoung. He apparently wasn’t too good at hiding his feelings as Youngjae immediately started explaining to him what was going on.

“Don’t worry, it’s a regular thing to do here. Every Monday there’s a group meeting to establish the goals for the week and brainstorm ideas or remind everyone of important events and deadlines,” Youngjae said as he collected his stationery. Everyone was standing up and heading to a set of big wooden double doors at the end of the corridor opposite the elevator. “And you should probably introduce yourself. I will introduce you.”

Jinyoung’s heart skipped a beat but there was no time for that. Just to be sure, he picked up a writing pad with the logo of the company and a ballpoint pen that his predecessor left in the desk.

He tried his best to disappear in the crowd of his coworkers as they walked into the spacious office, but that didn’t save him the anxiety of suddenly being in front of Im Jaebum with nothing to hide behind.

Im Jaebum was sat behind a huge desk as they all walked in, but then he stood up, walked around the desk and leaned against it. _Exactly like in the picture_ , Jinyoung thought. He looked so effortlessly smart that Jinyoung wondered if it was the same person as the guy he had met in college. And for a while, it even seemed like he did not notice Jinyoung, but as Jaebum scanned the room and Jinyoung’s coworkers started assuming their seats, Jinyoung suddenly found himself being looked at.

Jinyoung then made the mistake of looking at Jaebum and their eyes met. He was caught like a deer in the headlights, his breath stuck in his throat. He suddenly felt awkward, but what to do? Im Jaebum was there, right in front of him and there was nothing he could think of to make himself breathe again. It was suddenly just the two of them and so many questions hanging in between them. The moment lasted forever and Jinyoung wondered if that was what he wanted.

“This is the new employee, Mr. Im,” Youngjae finally broke the silence.

“Park Jinyoung,” he finally uttered and Jaebum took two long strides towards him to shake his hand. Jinyoung fought the urge to take a step back.

“Nice to meet you,” Jaebum said and Jinyoung wondered if he had already forgotten him. Jaebum’s gaze bore into him and Jinyoung resisted looking away. It was the handshake that brought him back to reality – this was not college anymore.

Jinyoung then sat down next to Youngjae as the meeting started. He took a few notes on the tasks he would take part in and observed the strange dynamic between the chairman and the employees – friendly, but calling everyone by their surname. Jinyoung would occasionally look in Jaebum’s direction but it felt like every time he did, Jaebum looked back at him and Jinyoung would immediately feel like a kid in class busted for talking to his classmates. So he tried to avoid it. The feeling of being under surveillance didn’t leave him.

“Alright, thanks everyone, the meeting is dismissed,” Jaebum finished eventually. As everyone started getting up, Jinyoung did too, feeling relieved. 

He looked at Jaebum for the last time to find Jaebum already looking at him.

“Park Jinyoung,” he heard as he was already turning around to leave. “Can we talk in private for a second?”

Jinyoung’s heart skipped a beat, and then another, and was he even breathing at that point?

Youngjae suddenly put his hand on his shoulder and he looked at him, startled. “It’s alright,” he assured him. _He has no idea what should be alright._ So he turned back to face Jaebum who was no longer looking at him but sitting down in an armchair. Jinyoung sat down as well. They waited until the room was empty and the click of the door closing silenced every noise.

  
  


“Mr. Park,” Jaebum broke the awkward silence and Jinyoung rapidly turned his head to look at him.

Jinyoung was too shocked by the situation to say anything. He did try to open his mouth and say something, but nothing came out.

“Jinyoung,” he corrected himself, understanding the silence as Jinyoung being weirded out by being called by his surname. He looked at him, waiting for a reaction, but there was none. “When did you start working here?”

“Today,” Jinyoung finally managed.

“Well, do you like it so far?”

“Yeah, I– I think so.”

“That’s good,” Jaebum breathed out with a faint smile and for a second, it seemed to Jinyoung as a sign of nervousness.

“I’m sorry, can I help you?” Jinyoung did not want to look like he was annoyed with the small talk, but the words suddenly came out and he could not take them back.

“Yes,” Jaebum exclaimed. Was it pity in his eyes? Remorse? “This might sound strange but I’m also new here so… maybe if you wanted to get lunch? We can catch up?”

“I already had lunch today,” Jinyoung said but caught himself sounding cold. “But maybe tomorrow?”

“That sounds great,” Jaebum nodded and Jinyoung caught a glimpse of what was supposed to be a warm smile.

“Mr. Im, I’m–”

“Please, Jaebum. This politeness is… uncomfortable.”

“...Jaebum. I think I should get back to work.”

“Yes, of course,” Jaebum said and stood up before even finishing the sentence. Jinyoung stood up as well. His head was spinning. “See you later.”

“Later,” Jinyoung said and closed the door behind him. _Did I leave too quickly?_

He walked to his desk deep in thoughts – Jaebum was not angry, not cold, not bossy. He was friendly and wanted to see him and talk to him. _Catch up_. The smartest thing to do would be to not ponder about it and get back to work as Youngjae still had plenty of things to teach him. But how could Jinyoung focus on anything after that?

“Jinyoung,” Youngjae exclaimed from his desk. “Is everything alright? You look pale,” he said as he sat down. Jinyoung could feel Mark’s cold gaze on him, but he did not care to look.

“Yeah, I guess? Jae– Mr. Im asked me to accompany him to lunch tomorrow,” he said unsure, suddenly realizing how strange it sounded. “I guess that is good?”

“Oh, nice! That is definitely a good sign,” Youngjae cheered him on and Jinyoung attempted to smile back at him.

Jinyoung arrived home – to Jackson’s apartment – at around 6 PM. He felt like he had never been more tired in his life, so he headed straight to the couch and fell down onto it, face first. He let out a groan, and then another and then he rolled onto his side to loosen his tie as his groan turned into a wail.

“Hey man, you good?” Jackson suddenly emerged from his room and Jinyoung jumped at the sound.

“Yeah,” Jinyoung lied. He sat down and took off his tie completely. Jackson sat down next to him.

“Was it bad?”

“I’m working directly under Jaebum,” Jinyoung breathed out quietly, almost hoping that Jackson would not hear him.

“Well, yeah, it _is_ Daeim.”

“No, I mean it.”

“Wait, so you…?”

“I work literally for Jaebum. Like, his office is just one door away. As in, I saw him today, I talked to him _and_ I definitely made a fool of myself,” Jinyoung complained, holding his head in his hands. Jackson sat completely silent for a moment, eyes wide in shock.

“Oh. My god,” he suddenly exclaimed. “What did he say? Does he look as good as in the photos? What did you talk about? Did you try to make a move?”

“Jackson, no! No, I didn’t try to make a move. I– He asked me to talk to him in private after a meeting and I think I was definitely rude and he’s going to fire me for sure, the guy before me apparently _rage quit_ so anything can happen right?!”

“Jinyoung,” Jackson repeated to get his attention and put an arm around him. “Jinyoung, it’s alright, I’m sure he won’t just fire you, you’re technically friends from college!”

“I’m not sure how that would stop him, he did ask me out to lunch but that can mean he wants to ask me to leave, right?”

“Jinyoung, listen to me, he is not going to fire you. Just… explain to me what happened so we can properly talk about it, alright?”

So Jinyoung did and Jackson surprisingly did not think that Jaebum wanted to fire Jinyoung. Jinyoung found himself frequently revisiting his memories from college to comfort himself, despite finding it odd that the Jaebum he knew in college was the same Jaebum that was now the chairman of one of the biggest corporation in South Korea – was it not a little unfair that someone who took almost the same classes as him had a career path so much brighter?

He frequently revisited the memory of his first conversation with Jaebum. Jinyoung was sitting in a lecture hall, waiting for the lecture to start when Jaebum and some other guy sat down right in front of him. Jinyoung told himself that it was not a big deal, but he still made sure to update Jackson on the fact.

“Hi, sorry, can I ask you something?” Jaebum was speaking to him and Jinyoung almost jumped in his seat.

“Sure, what’s up?” Jinyoung managed nonchalantly.

“I missed the last class, do you maybe have notes? What was the topic?”

“Oh,” Jinyoung breathed out, still not believing what was happening. “I… I really have no idea,” he chuckled. “I usually rely on my friend who takes the notes for me.” _I have to sound so so stupid right now_.

“I totally get you,” Jaebum chuckled. “This is really not my thing either.”

“I’m Jinyoung, by the way,” he suddenly blurted out before he could even think about it, decide if it was appropriate or even would be welcomed.

Jaebum’s eyes widened in a slight shock at Jinyoung’s exclamation, but immediately a soft smile appeared on his lips as he nodded. “Jaebum,” he introduced himself in a soft, almost shy voice. Jinyoung did not know at that time, but later he realized that Jaebum was maybe a little bit hesitant because people usually knew who he was immediately, without needing an introduction. And it also was not usually Jaebum who spoke up first, it was everyone else who craved the attention of the heir of Daeim.

“Do you live on campus? I haven’t seen you around much,” Jinyoung said but at that time, he did realize how strange that sounded. _Do I really want him to know I’ve been looking at him for a few weeks already?_

“No, I don’t.”

“You’re not missing out on much, the dorms are pretty bad,” Jinyoung was struggling to find a topic and was slowly realizing that the conversation was not going too well.

“Do you think you could send me the notes from your friend?”

 _Right, the notes. Focus on the topic._ “Yeah, sure.”

And then there was a second of awkward silence that felt like an entire hour to Jinyoung. And that one day, Jinyoung was relieved when the lecturer came into the classroom.

“Oh, here goes nothing,” Jinyoung said in a mocking voice and Jaebum chuckled as he turned around. Jinyoung felt his face flush at the sound of Jaebum’s soft laughter.

Despite all the conversations that Jinyoung had with Jackson, and everything that he was scared of, and all the nervousness from seeing Jaebum, he still had to go to work the next day. He did try a little bit more getting ready this time, but it did not offer him much comfort, rather more worry that he does not look presentable enough.

What were his feelings, anyway? Jinyoung realized that instead of just listening to his music, he found himself thinking about what Jaebum would think if this and that, and what would happen if Jinyoung did this and Jaebum would do that, and what would have to happen for Jaebum to do that and this. Jinyoung wanted his thoughts back, wanted to zone out or get upset at people in the public transport, but there was Jaebum again in the corner of his mind and the thought of him popped up every time Jinyoung was not completely focusing on something. It was confusing.

It was not a _crush_ . Or at least Jinyoung did not feel like it was. A crush was what he had felt in college, and then he got rejected. It felt like a betrayal first, then regret, then it felt stupid. Jinyoung got into the moment where Jaebum was finally something stable – _a memory_. And you do not have to think about a memory and memory is not a crush and it can not become one. What Jinyoung was sure about was that he felt a sense of familiarity with Jaebum, like when you stop seeing your friend for a while but any time you meet everything falls back into place. But meeting Jaebum did not feel like the pieces fit together perfectly, like they were still rough around the edges and did not completely align. 

It was Choi Youngjae who first greeted Jinyoung as he walked into the office. He offered him a cup of coffee and attempted to strike up a conversation, but Jinyoung could not help himself but to constantly look in the direction of the chairman’s office.

“Are you nervous?” Youngjae asked him and Jinyoung suddenly emerged from his thoughts.

“Why?”

“You keep looking that way. You are going to lunch with Mr. Im today, right?”

“Yeah,” Jinyoung exhaled and finally looked at Youngjae. He was smiling brightly at him.

They decided to have the lunch in a traditional restaurant near the office building. Jaebum decided that, Jinyoung went with whatever Jaebum would choose to avoid conflict. Jinyoung tried to make himself think that it was not awkward, but it was hard to deny how heavily the atmosphere hung around them and how Jinyoung’s throat was so dry he could barely speak up.

“So, what have you been up to since graduating?” Jaebum asked the obvious question the moment they sat down to eat.

“Well,” _not much_. Jinyoung took in a long breath and looked around the restaurant as if the answer was written somewhere on the walls. “This is actually my first more proper job. I mostly did part-time in college so finding a well-paying job is tough with experience like that.”

“But you are well qualified for any kind of job in your field,” Jaebum objected.

“Thank you for saying that,” Jinyoung looked in Jaebum’s eyes. Jaebum was staring deep into his eyes and for a moment, Jinyoung was surprised to see that Jaebum is not just making small talk. He means it.

“So are you still talking to anyone from college?”

“Yeah, I’m really good friends with Jackson, if you remember him. I moved in with him recently.” Jinyoung did not mention that it was because Jinyoung was completely broke. Even though it was Jaebum, he still felt like if he was being interviewed for a job.

“Oh,” Jaebum exhaled, surprised. “I barely talk to anyone from there. With all the company stuff, I just don’t have the time…” he trailed off, still maintaining eye contact with him. Jinyoung tried to busy himself with the menu.

“I have to admit, when I met you in college I had absolutely no idea who you were,” Jinyoung chuckled.

“I noticed that, yeah,” Jaebum laughed out loud and Jinyoung looked up at him. There was something about Jaebum’s laugh that felt so precious, so rare that Jinyoung could not help himself but to look every time.

“How come that you inherited the company so early? I mean, you’re still fresh out of college,” Jinyoung asked, suddenly feeling the pieces of their friendship falling back together.

“Jinyoungie…” Jaebum sighed and Jinyoung’s heart picked up a pace upon hearing his name being said in such way. “You never really read the news, right?”

“I read the headlines,” Jinyoung defended himself, but he knew that the argument was weak. “Sometimes.”

“Both my parents died.”

There was something scary about the way Jaebum said it that sent a chill down Jinyoung’s spine. Jaebum was still looking straight into his eyes and for that moment, Jinyoung did not even look away. He waited for Jaebum to become angry, to look away and stand up to leave. But instead, he looked at him, almost _observed_. Jinyoung put a hand over his mouth like if he wanted to stop the words coming from his mouth, but not even closing his eyes made Jaebum disappear.

“You don’t need to pity me, really,” Jaebum finally looked away and flipped through the menu, his gaze finally on something that was not Jinyoung. “I went through so much of it with all the press it doesn’t even feel that devastating at this point.”

 _Is he lying?_ Jinyoung thought for a moment, trying to deduce some signs from Jaebum’s body language. But as his own emotions, he could not read Jaebum. “I’m so sorry, Jaebum,” Jinyoung said and for that moment, it was Jaebum still looking away.

"Don't feel bad," Jaebum assured him, but that did not comfort Jinyoung too much. "If I was anyone else, you wouldn't have a way of knowing that,” he cleared his throat. “Let's change the topic."

So they talked about college and the office and Jaebum let Jinyoung on some company gossip, but for Jinyoung what was important was the fact that they were talking like they were old friends. And yet it did not feel like a friendship, what the two of them had.

The food was good but expensive. Jinyoung tried to pick out the cheapest option, but not so cheap that it would be obvious. He definitely could not afford to eat his lunch in a restaurant every day. _He will see right through me_ , he thought, knowing that he would have to start going to the company canteen to save at least some money for food. The more he was surprised to hear Jaebum say that he would pay for the lunch with the company card.

They were putting on their coats when Jinyoung turned around to say something to Jaebum, but Jaebum was standing right behind him, so he almost walked into him, stopping right in front of his chest. Jaebum did not seem too surprised by the fact, or maybe he just maintained his poker face. Jinyoung let out a startled gasp and felt his heart picking up a rapid pace. Jaebum’s gaze was even stronger from barely one foot away from Jinyoung’s face. But it was just a coincidence that they were standing so close to each other, so Jaebum put on his coat and headed to the door.

Jinyoung could swear that right before he walked away, a tiny smirk appeared on Jaebum’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They closed all of the schools in my country, including universities, because of the corona outbreak and my classes aren't online yet so I guess I'm updating this lol. Also I read someone on reddit mention that now with everything closed, there will be a sudden rise in updates, so I guess I'm contributing to that.
> 
> IMPORTANT: I opened a fan account on instagram!! Definitely go follow it [@woosanthighs](https://www.instagram.com/woosanthighs/) !!! I'm thinking of making little moodboards for each chapter or something similar, and all of that is going to appear there. 
> 
> I admit, this is maybe a little bit of a filler chapter. But my school will be closed for at least a month, so I'm pretty sure I will update soon. Let me know in the comments what you thought about Jaebum's introduction, I tried my best to make it good. Also, thank you SO much for all kudos and comments on the first chapter! It honestly makes me so happy to read your comments, it always makes my day to know that someone enjoyed my writing.
> 
> See you in the next update!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of fluff, getting closer and Jaebum's POV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time goes by fast when you're stuck at home, so I literally had to be reminded in the comments to update. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter, we're finally getting somewhere...
> 
> A moodboard for this fic is now on my instagram! Check it out [@woosanthighs](https://www.instagram.com/woosanthighs/)

It was in less than two weeks that Jinyoung was finally confronted about his lunches with Jaebum. The chairman asked Jinyoung for “lunch meetings” (that is what Jaebum presented it as for tax purposes) frequently so he barely even had a meal with people from the office. He did have lunch with Youngjae a couple of times, but he found that he did not talk to him as easily as he talked to Jaebum. 

“Jinyoung,” Mark said one time out of nothing. Jinyoung was definitely used to Mark calling him by his name. “Can I talk to you about something?” Mark didn’t leave Jinyoung a second to reply and stood up from his desk, walking towards the break room. It was completely empty at that time of the day.

“What is it?” Jinyoung asked. Mark was leaning against the counter with hands in his pockets, watching him carefully as Jinyoung closed the door behind them and took a few steps into the middle of the room. Jinyoung crossed his hands in front of his chest to subconsciously take a defending position.

“What’s the deal with Mr. Im?”

_ Oh right. It’s Mr. Im. _

Mark looked at Jinyoung with an expression that Jinyoung couldn’t read clearly.

“I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

“Maybe you didn’t notice because you’re new, but he does not talk to anyone this much. I myself talked to him maybe three times since he got into the position. So what are you doing that he has lunch meetings with you?” Mark was not saying it in a malicious way, Jinyoung realized. It sounded genuinely curious.

“I’m not doing anything, I don’t think so,” Jinyoung shook his head softly.

“Come on, what do you talk about? Do you like the same movies, music, or…?”

Jinyoung had already previously decided that it was not a good idea to share that he knew Jaebum from earlier. It was already sheer luck that he got the job and he certainly didn’t want any possible allegations of favouritism to destroy the opportunity. “I guess we just clicked really well.”

“Jinyoung,” Mark exclaimed in a warning tone and took a long stride towards him. He was definitely in Jinyoung’s personal space, but it was way different from when the same happened to him with Jaebum. “I’ve been working here for almost 3 years now. I work overtime, I barely take out any free days, I put myself out there so much. I finally got to this position.” Mark’s tone was no longer friendly and there was a spark of anger in his eyes, but he was still keeping a steady, quiet voice so no one could overhear. “So tell me, how is it possible that you just got the job and are suddenly best friends with the boss? The  _ chairman? _ If you really are innocent and there is nothing going on, you should really consider not doing this.”

“But who am I hurting?”

“Everyone else in the office would also like a fair chance to become an  _ ass-kisser _ .” 

“Jae–  _ Mr. Im _ is not someone who would care about kissing ass. Maybe you would learn that if you actually talked to people around you. It’s not my fault that he talks to me. And I’m not talking to him because I’d want a better career.”

Mark stood there wordlessly as Jinyoung took a step back from him and walked away. Before he heard the door close behind Jinyoung, he spoke up and heard as Jinyoung stopped, “Do you think you could at least bring this up to him?”

Jinyoung subconsciously nodded – not as a yes, it was more of an acknowledgement of the question – and left the break room. He did not talk to Jaebum about anything Mark said to him. At that time, he was not completely sure whether that was because he found it stupid, or because he did not want to share Jaebum with anyone.

But Jaebum was not always so approachable. Sometimes days would pass when he would be away for business and Jinyoung would not hear from him at all – which made complete sense, Jaebum was his boss and he had no obligation like that towards Jinyoung. Some days, he would just stay inside his office for the whole day and would not speak to anyone, neck-deep in overdue work. And on occasions, he would talk in private with someone else from the office. That scared Jinyoung the most,  _ is he going to replace me?, _ he thought. On the days that Jaebum would be away, Jinyoung would talk to Youngjae, but he had little interest in the rest of the office. He talked to Mark too, but only very carefully. He would occasionally find himself talking to him in a way that made Mark talk more about himself and Jinyoung would not have to reveal too much about himself  _ or Jaebum _ .

It was on one of the rare days that Jaebum was not in his office at all and he was not on any meetings or business trips – no one in the office, including his secretary, knew his whereabouts. Jinyoung was busy with work when Kim Yugyeom called for him in a serious, pressing voice. He saved his project and followed him to the front desk.

"What is it?" 

Yugyeom gave Jinyoung the phone. "It's Mr. Im. He needs you to deliver him some files."

Jinyoung's heart skipped a beat.

"Mr. Im," he said carefully into the phone.

"Hi, I don't need any files," Jaebum's voice echoed from the speaker. He sounded tired and spoke softly and slowly.

"Then what–"

"I have this crazy headache but I left my pills in the office. I need you to get them for me. Go to my desk and in the second drawer, there is a box. I called a driver for you, he will be waiting outside. Can you do this for me, please?"

Jinyoung was confused. The whole thing sounded like a secret mission. "I will, no problem."

"Thank you so much," Jaebum said and hung up.

Jinyoung headed straight for the office. It felt wrong to be there and the large space was eerily quiet. He wondered if someone is watching him through security cameras as he approached the desk from the other side and pulled out the second drawer. There was a box of pills laying among other things like stapler and hole puncher. Jinyoung picked it up and curiously looked around the office – maybe he could pick up more clues to what Jaebum's life is like. He fought the temptation to go through the papers that were laying on the desk and headed to the door. Before he left, he picked up a random file from a shelf and shoved the box of pills into his pocket.

The ride to Jaebum's apartment was smooth. Jinyoung imagined what it would be like to have a private driver with a car nice like this to drive him to work every day, to be able to just throw money on a problem and have people solve it for you. He wondered what Jaebum's apartment looks like.  _ I should really get my own place _ .

Turns out Jaebum lived in a penthouse apartment –  _ of course _ – in a building where the lobby itself was bigger than Jinyoung's old apartment. He was let upstairs immediately after the receptionist checked his ID. Before he stepped into the elevator, he took a final glance outside through the glass door and saw a massive camera lens pointed at his face.

When he entered Jaebum's apartment it was almost completely dark and most of the light came from thin slits between the tall window curtains and the wall. Jinyoung could barely see anything, but he could recognise shadows of some probably very expensive and modern furniture arranged all around the huge living space.

"Jinyoung?" A voice suddenly echoed from somewhere in the apartment. Jinyoung walked further and noticed a door opened ajar. "I'm here," the voice said and Jinyoung was now certain where it is coming from.

"Hi, Jaebum," he said as he slowly opened the door, his heart pounding inside of his chest. The room was completely dark but then a small bedside lamp turned on and submerged the room in soft yellow light. Jinyoung placed his hand on his pocket to ensure that the rectangular object was still there.

In the middle of the fairly small room – small in comparison to the rest of the apartment – there was a king-sized bed and one entire wall consisted of windows covered behind blackout curtains. The wall opposite to it had two doors and a generic picture of a beach hung on it. On the third wall, there was a TV and a small dresser under it. In the middle of the king-sized bed, there was a figure hiding under a blanket.

A head of unkempt hair suddenly emerged from under the blanket – Jaebum. He sat down on the bed and ran his hand through his hair to flatten it.

"Here are your pills," Jinyoung approached him and extended his arm to hand him the box, "and here is…" he opened the random file he picked up in the office to read what is inside: "Accounting 2014 to 2015."

Jaebum looked at him suspiciously. "What is that for?"

"A cover-up. You told the receptionist that you need a file delivered, so I did."

Jaebum chuckled and pointed at a bedside table, so Jinyoung put it there. 

"Are you alright?" Jinyoung asked after a moment of silence. Jaebum gestured him to sit down on the bed.

"Once in a while, I get these horrible stress migraines. My doctor prescribed me these pills for it, but I ran out of the packet that I had here," he explained as he took out a pill from the packaging. Jinyoung handed him a glass of water from the table and Jaebum swallowed the pill with the liquid. "And thank you for taking the time to bring me this. I will make sure you don't get scolded for not doing your work or something."

"It's no problem," Jinyoung uttered quietly. There was something else bothering him. "Why didn't your secretary bring it to you? Why the cover-up?"

Jaebum sighed, obviously disappointed by the question. He usually did not show too much emotion, but right now he was vulnerable and hiding would require energy that he did not have. "As a chaebol heir, I was never used to having close friends. I did have some, but a lot of them just turned out to be there for the money, which I found out as I got older. I don't even feel comfortable around my siblings and I haven't told anyone about the migraines apart from my mum. And when I inherited the chairman office…" Jaebum trailed off, looking into the bed. Jinyoung carefully watched him. He had visible under-eye bags and his skin looked rough and reddish. A greyish shade on his jaw revealed that he had not shaved. "I just don't generally trust the people in the office. They are not my friends, we address each other politely and who knows what would happen if they found out I have this vulnerability."

"Then who am I?" Jaebum looked up and met Jinyoung's gaze.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm also  _ people in the office _ ."

"I was hoping you were a friend?" Jaebum asked, and it was so simple. Not a demand, but a statement of a fact. Jinyoung suddenly felt vulnerable.

"Yes," he exhaled with a faint smile on his lips, "we can be friends."

Jinyoung felt like he should be upset about it, that  _ no, he did not want to be just friends _ , but he realized he did not feel like that anymore. Jaebum could be his friend and Jinyoung was happy about it. In a way, Jaebum was the closest he had to a friend in the office.

Yet he did not act like Jaebum was his actual friend. He wondered if it was because his heartbeat sped up way too quickly upon seeing Jaebum, or if it was the way he thought about him – recalling their lunches, their conversations, the way Jaebum laughed at his joke.

“I think I will try to rest now,” Jaebum said after a while, “hopefully the painkillers will start working soon.”

“I hope you will feel better soon,” Jinyoung stood up, taking it as a cue for him to leave, “can I get you anything before I go?”

Jaebum was silent for a moment, looking at Jinyoung as he slowly moved towards the door. “Stay?”

“I don’t want to bother you,” Jinyoung managed after a brief moment of silence, looking into the wall in front of him. Anywhere but Jaebum.

“You’re not,” Jaebum breathed out. Jinyoung did not answer, so Jaebum continued, hoping to clear Jinyoung’s doubts. Whatever they could be. “I will let the office know you’re out for work and make sure no one is doubting your work performance. Do you have any deadlines soon?”

Jinyoung still did not answer and Jaebum wondered if he is having second thoughts on their friendship. Jinyoung was scared of overstepping any boundaries. “Alright, I will,” he said, absentmindedly.

So they decided to put on some random drama on the TV that would hopefully not be too demanding and Jaebum turned the volume so low that they had to turn on the subtitles for Jinyoung to understand. Jinyoung realized after a while that Jaebum is not even paying attention, that he is partially napping and that the drama is on so Jinyoung would not get bored. Jinyoung sat down on the bed next to Jaebum, not even taking off his jacket or loosening his tie, sitting up against the headboard as if he was in a meeting. Jaebum was too exhausted to question this behaviour, hoping that Jinyoung was not paying too much attention to how pathetic he looked in his sweaty sleepwear that consisted of an old T-shirt and underwear.

  
  
  


Jaebum woke up slowly, drifting in and out of sleep in the comfort of his warm blanket and the darkness of his room, with only a sliver of light creating the shadows of his furniture. As he began to take in his surroundings, he realized that Jinyoung was not in the room and the TV was off. Curled on his side, he noticed that there was light coming from under his bedroom door and he could hear Jinyoung talking to someone. His voice was low and quiet, not like anything Jaebum has heard so far from him.

“...not home yet,” Jinyoung said and Jaebum assumed he was pacing in front of the room. “Jaebum is sick so he asked me to bring him some medicine and then asked me to stay… …no, it was his idea… ...I will tell you everything when I get home…” Who was he talking to? “...Do you want me to get anything?... ...No really, it’s okay… ...I want to, alright… ...there will be other times…” 

There was a long pause and Jaebum could hear Jinyoung sigh loudly. Then suddenly, he was talking in a whisper, but loud enough for Jaebum to still hear him. “Jackson, I’m sure it’s just a friendly thing. I’m not even sure how I feel about… ...it feels wrong to bring it up now… ...that was college, though… ...alright, whatever, talk to you later? I will try to get home soon.” Jinyoung’s voice went back to normal and Jaebum could see two shadows under the door – Jinyoung was standing right in front of it. “Sure, I will text you. Later, Jackson,” he said as he hung up.

Jaebum sat up on the bed as the door opened with a yellow glow spilling into the dark bedroom and partially blinding Jaebum. Jinyoung was nothing but a shadow standing in the middle of it. Jaebum squeezed his eyes so he could properly see him. Jinyoung stepped into the room with a glass of water, sat up on the end of the bed and handed it to Jaebum.

“How are you feeling?” Jinyoung asked as Jaebum slowly sipped the water.

“Just a little bit tired, the headache is almost gone,” he said and Jinyoung nodded his head, looking down on the bed. He was still looking put together and his facial features were soft in the golden light. After a short while, he looked at Jaebum and met his gaze. The moment lasted for a few seconds, but it barely felt real with Jinyoung looking so surreal with only half of his face illuminated.

Suddenly, a smirk appeared on Jinyoung’s lips. Then it turned into a chuckle. Jaebum tilted his head in question. “It’s your hair,” Jinyoung muttered lightheartedly.

“Really?” Jaebum laughed and tried to pat down his hair that was sticking out in all directions.

Jinyoung took Jaebum’s now empty glass and carried it to the bedside table. As he sat back down on the bed, Jaebum was looking at him with now more serious face. “What is it?”

“You should go home now,” Jaebum replied softly, nodding towards him.

“Did you hear– ? It’s fine, I’m not in a hurry,” Jinyoung dismissed him.

“What time is it?”

“It’s almost six.”

“Jinyoung,” Jaebum sighed in disappointment, “you have to go home.”

“You obviously called me here because you needed help. I’m not leaving just because it’s late.”

“If I promise you to feel well and healthy, would you listen?”

Jinyoung looked at Jaebum with an unreadable expression. “Fine, you win,” he said, finally. Jaebum tried his best to not think much about the fact that Jinyoung haggled with him to stay with him. It certainly did not feel good to dismiss Jinyoung’s attention like this, but Jinyoung had a life too and he had to respect that. No matter how jealous it made him.

Jaebum had always been fascinated by Jinyoung in a way he could not very well describe. It was something in the way that he acted, seemingly unbothered by the world, but it took very little to throw him off balance with even the slightest hints of affection. Jaebum had noticed Jinyoung pretty early on after entering college – it was hard not to with Jinyoung’s effortlessly handsome traits. Jaebum frequently met people from rich families who did not hesitate to spend thousands on their clothes and plastic surgeries, but Jinyoung was not that. Even in the most boring clothes, he stood out in a crowd of students and that enticed Jaebum, even more, to find out more about him, to crack the shell and solve the mystery of Park Jinyoung.

And then he had finally talked to him and realized it had been a trap all along – Jinyoung was not just good looks and cold attitude, he was funny and smart and the way he laughed made Jaebum feel all warm inside. Suddenly he wanted Jinyoung’s undivided attention and wanted to spend more time with him and when he said something with the slightest hint of flirting he felt a rush of anxiety, a fear of rejection.

So they eventually found themselves hanging out together before and after class, mostly studying or talking or getting snacks for the class. It felt good to have someone to talk to on a regular basis, despite the few occasions that Jinyoung spent the time with his friend instead, or when Jaebum had business matters to attend. On those days, he missed Jinyoung and impatiently waited for the next week to roll around.

It was on a day that was no different from others – Jaebum was sitting in the library with Jinyoung, working on a paper that was due that evening. For some reason, he found it hard to focus. Jinyoung was sitting next to him, working on his own assignments, and Jaebum kept glancing at his laptop instead of his own. The library was surprisingly empty and the only sound Jaebum could hear was the clicking of Jinyoung’s keyboard. Outside of school, Jaebum had recently been stressing over some business deals that his father assigned him to, but at that moment he felt strangely calm, resting his head in his palm and not even trying to focus on the task in front of him.

And then, out of the blue, he realized it – he liked Jinyoung. Not in a superficial way, not just his face, he liked Jinyoung as a person and he wanted to spend time with him as much as he could. And he realized he had never felt that before, not in a genuine way, not in a way that would make his heart pound inside of his chest every time he even thought about Jinyoung – which is possibly why it had been so easy for him to fall into the trap. He felt his face flush suddenly as he realized he had been sitting so close to Jinyoung that he could hear his breathing and for some reason that made him think about being even more close.

And maybe he did not  _ just like  _ Jinyoung. He had been thinking about Jinyoung so much that everything reminded him of him. When he listened to music, every love song was suddenly about Jinyoung and even on the days that he did not have a class with him he dressed up thinking about randomly bumping into him and wanting to look his best. And when he was with his father in public he thought about whether Jinyoung would see the pictures or videos that the paparazzi took. (He was pretty sure that Jinyoung had no idea who Jaebum’s family was and he was not going to bring it up selfishly, and maybe he didn’t even want Jinyoung to know.) 

Then he thought about getting closer to Jinyoung. Should he confess? Should he ask him out? Jaebum was a practical person and usually didn’t waste time hesitating when he wanted to get closer to someone, but what he felt with Jinyoung was different. Jinyoung didn’t seem like he talked to Jaebum just to get his money or to get famous for sleeping with him or to try to blackmail him, and Jinyoung also wasn’t just a pretty face or a toy for the night. And admittedly, it had been a long while since Jaebum was with someone – maybe since he first talked to Jinyoung. The phenomenon of Park Jinyoung was no less a curious one and the last thing Jaebum wanted to do was to ruin it.

“What?” Jinyoung suddenly spoke up and Jaebum almost flinched. He looked at Jinyoung, confused. “You were staring. Is the essay so bad?”

He’d been staring into Jinyoung’s laptop the whole time. “No, sorry, I just zoned out,” he apologized, but when he looked back at Jinyoung it wasn’t like before – he felt like his thoughts were written all over his face and Jinyoung could read it all. So he looked away in shame and buried his gaze in the blank word document in front of him.

Jaebum did not notice that Jinyoung looked at him for a moment longer, trying to decipher the hidden meaning behind what he was saying and hoping it was something similar to what he had been thinking about recently as well.

But Jaebum was a busy man and things happen, so when he had found out that his mother got sick, everything else had to go.

Jaebum dragged himself to work right the next day despite fighting the rest of the headache. When he stepped out of the elevator he caught a glance of Jinyoung talking to Choi Youngjae and for the shortest moment, their eyes met. Jinyoung smiled at him, ‘it’s good to see you here’ and Jaebum smiled back at him as a ‘thank you’. His heart skipped a beat on the thought that they had met outside of work like this and no one else knew, so he kept looking at Jinyoung for a moment longer after he had already looked away.

He had barely sat down at his desk when there was a knock on the door. It was Choi Youngjae, Yugyeom… and Jinyoung. He greeted all of them with a single nod and before he could say anything, one of the men spoke up.

“Good morning, sir,” Youngjae said. Jaebum looked at Jinyoung but he was looking elsewhere. “There is a new employee– well he is an intern, and Jinyoung also recently started working here, so we were thinking we could organize some kind of company dinner.”

Jaebum knew about an intern joining the team, but he hasn’t identified him yet. “When would that be?”

The group of three looked at each other before Choi Youngjae spoke up again: “We were thinking this Friday.”

Jaebum had already thought about it – he was directly above these people but barely knew them. On the other side, why not keep it that way? He had no particular interest in the lives of other people and he felt like the relationship between a boss and his subordinates was better off purely professional. But then, what about Jinyoung?

Jaebum also had almost no experience as a superior – these people were basically asking him to pay for everyone’s food and drinks, which he did question the etiquette of, but also who was  _ he _ to think that his subordinates don’t deserve his attention outside of the office?  _ I pay attention to Jinyoung more than I do to everyone else combined _ .

“Alright,” he said eventually, leaning back in his chair, “book a nice place, put in a deposit so we would have the entire place for ourselves.” Jaebum wasn’t familiar with being a boss, but he knew how to present himself in public – booking out an entire restaurant was a way to ensure no one would be eavesdropping on their conversations.

“Well, do you have a preference, sir?”

“I will leave that up to you,” Jaebum said in conclusion. “Why are you here?” he nodded towards Yugyeom.

“I just wanted to support the idea,” Yugyeom stuttered, clearly taken aback.

“Alright, if that’s all,” Jaebum dismissed the group and the three of them bowed before turning around towards the exit. “Park Jinyoung?”

Jinyoung almost flinched upon hearing his full name. He stopped and immediately turned around to face Jaebum. Both of them waited until Youngjae and Yugyeom left the room to speak.

“What was this?” Jaebum asked, but it was not really a question towards Jinyoung rather than thinking out loud. Jinyoung didn’t say anything, just sat down on the couch. He didn’t look at Jaebum. Jaebum didn’t want to admit to himself how insecure it made him feel.

“Well, everyone in the office sees you like this cold boss that doesn’t allow fun,” Jinyoung muttered, almost like if he didn’t want Jaebum to hear.

Jaebum was silent for a moment, observing Jinyoung. He was sitting still, looking into his lap and playing with his cufflinks. “Do you see me as cold?”

Jinyoung finally met Jaebum’s gaze. “I’m not  _ everyone in the office _ , right?” Jaebum’s breath caught in his throat – Jinyoung was referring to what Jaebum had said earlier,  _ in his bed _ . But then Jinyoung’s voice changed as he continued: “Listen, Youngjae asked me to go with him because he was scared of you. Mark is annoyed that he doesn’t get as many opportunities to show his work because you barely communicate.”

Jaebum felt his heart constrict in his chest. Jinyoung has never been this honest with him. He actually sounded upset.

Jinyoung stood up to leave. “I’m sorry if I crossed a line. But the dinner is a really good idea,” he smiled at him at the end and Jaebum understood – there was no bad intent behind what Jinyoung had said. He was worried about the office and it was not even two months that he had been working there.

Before Jinyoung closed the door behind him, he turned around one last time: “How do you feel?”

“The headache is almost gone,” Jaebum said absentmindedly. Jinyoung smiled at him and left him all alone in the uselessly big office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh you have no idea what's coming in the next chapter... *evil laugh*
> 
> Fun fact: Youngjae was originally a female oc, before I decided that it was stupid and that I'd much rather have a cheerful Youngjae there. I hope that this time I didn't forget any "her"s as I did last time.
> 
> Thanks a lot for all the love in the comments!!! It makes me really happy and cheers me up in these hard times. Follow me [@woosanthighs](https://www.instagram.com/woosanthighs/) for lil updates and maybe more moodboards in the future. It is my first fan account, so go easy on me lol.
> 
> So yeah, thank you for kudos and comments, see you in the next update!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the dinner and everything goes wrong + markson meets

There was no actual dress code for the dinner, so Jaebum decided to wear a suit jacket with a loosely fitting shirt, the topmost buttons undone – that way he was not wearing the classic business attire while still playing it safe in case paparazzi would show up to criticize his wardrobe. (Also he was pretty confident that the shirt made him look hot, and combined with his hair done in a more messy way he was sure he would attract at least a little bit more attention from Jinyoung.)

Jaebum called a ride for himself to get to the restaurant, as he suspected he would not be able to drive back home. It was already dark out and raining slightly and it was the sort of melancholic feeling of late evening rides that made him think about what he was actually doing – what he was expecting to happen between him and Jinyoung?

He wanted him. But how did Jinyoung feel?

Jaebum thought back to the phone call he had accidentally eavesdropped on – “ _ that was college, though _ ,” Jinyoung said in a tone that Jaebum could not interpret. Jaebum still thought back to the moment that Jinyoung had tried to ask him out on a date, so he knew that Jinyoung was interested at one point.  _ But that was college, though. _

Did Jinyoung still want him?

There was another thing that Jinyoung had said into the phone: “ _ I’m sure it’s just a friendly thing. I’m not even sure how I feel about… _ ”. There was a chance that Jinyoung was actually shy and did not know what to think after being called directly to his boss’ apartment, and frankly, Jaebum enjoyed giving little mixed signals like that, but what if there was another reason for Jinyoung to feel the need to talk to someone else at that moment? 

_ What if Jinyoung has someone already? _

He thought back to all their encounters – what if the coldness behind some of Jinyoung’s actions was not just his personality but part of his opinion on Jaebum?

Jaebum was suddenly torn out his spiral of thoughts when his driver announced that they arrived at the restaurant. It was a modern, medium-sized establishment with large windows that allowed passersby to glance at the luxuriously decorated interior. Jaebum could see that most people were already there – most people that he barely knew by name.

As he walked inside, he was greeted with a loud cheer from everyone and some of the closest to the door stood up to greet him personally – Choi Youngjae, Mark Tuan and Kim Yugyeom, to name a few. 

There was also the new intern. He was from Thailand and went by a nickname Bambam. Yugyeom instantly introduced him and Jaebum realized that he did care about the employees as it felt somewhat heartwarming to see Yugyeom be so excited about the intern. 

Jaebum sat down at one of the long tables that the people from the office occupied, somewhat in the middle of it. There was one spot vacant directly opposite to him.

“Is everyone here?”

“No, Jinyoung said he would arrive a little later,” Mark, who sat right next to him, answered.

But before he could finish his thought, the door opened. Jinyoung walked in and suddenly the whole world stopped around Jaebum. No one really paid much attention to his arrival, but Jaebum also did not really focus on others – at that moment, it was all Jinyoung. He was wearing a black turtleneck and his hair was styled skillfully, parted on the side. He was not wearing his usual dress pants but a more skinny pair that hugged his thighs. Jaebum did not even realize he was looking him up and down until their eyes met and Jaebum was caught like a deer in the headlights, completely breathless.

“Hi everyone,” Jinyoung said and a couple of his coworkers greeted him back. Jaebum, instead of also saying hi, only nodded at him and managed a smile. It had felt like a fight when they talked about the company dinner back at the office, but somehow there was no awkwardness about it afterwards and Jaebum was even glad that Jinyoung was honest with him at the time. 

That was a rare thing in Daeim.

Jinyoung sat down right opposite to Jaebum, which was both blessing and a curse: Jaebum could easily talk to him, but there was also no escape. The only thing Jaebum could do was to stare at him.

When everyone got their drinks, Jaebum decided to step out of his comfort zone and initiated a toast. He stood up with his glass of wine and looked around the tables.

“It has been a month and a half since I got this position and I’m grateful that I’ve been met with such great people in the office,” he looked at Jinyoung and then at some other people that he did not know by name, “I’d like to thank Choi Youngjae for organizing this event so we can all have a little bit of fun as we welcome our two new employees,” he gestured to Jinyoung and Bambam, who both got up with their glasses as well. “So, to Daeim,” Jaebum exclaimed and the rest of the room stood up to cheer, drinks in hands.

Jaebum looked at Jinyoung and their eyes met. He gestured towards him with his glass and Jinyoung mirrored him. Jaebum brought the drink to his lips, tasting it for the first time while keeping the eye contact. There was some kind of energy between them at the moment, the sudden silence pulling them together and Jaebum felt being helplessly drawn in Jinyoung’s eyes. It was impossible to withstand, so no matter how reckless it was, Jaebum did not resist and whenever it was possible it was Jinyoung who he looked at and Jinyoung who he talked to.

The alcohol definitely helped him to ignore all his doubts about what Jinyoung actually thought. As the night went along people started to leave to go home to their families, so after two or three hours it was almost only Mark, Yugyeom, Bambam, Youngjae and Jinyoung who were left. It might have been the alcohol, but Jaebum found it pretty easy to talk to these people. Everyone has loosened up at least a little bit so the conversation was not about work all the time. He was pretty sure that Yugyeom and Bambam were maybe too drunk and should probably stop, but Jinyoung was also pretty drunk and Jaebum was curious where the conversation would lead them.

Jaebum’s head was spinning from all the thoughts racing through and his body felt hot all over and suddenly he wanted to act, to do something. Jinyoung’s cheeks were slightly flushed and he looked so happy, so content. Jaebum watched him part his lips to take a deep, audible breath like one does before diving and then Jinyoung looked at him. Jaebum felt his face heat up as his heart skipped a beat, but Jinyoung was suddenly standing up and walking away. 

“Excuse me,” he said before he completely turned away, sparing Jaebum one meaningful glance.

So Jaebum stood up too before he could overthink it and followed him shortly after – to the restroom. He immediately realized it was a bad idea from how he could barely walk a straight line, but that did not stop him. He carelessly opened the door to the restroom – leaned his entire body weight into it as the door creaked violently – and there he was.

“I hope I’m not reading this all wrong,” he stuttered quietly, more for himself than for Jinyoung to hear. 

The restroom was quiet and there was fresh air coming through a window, but that did not make Jaebum any more sober. He was drunk and even more drunk on the thought of Jinyoung. There was no going back, he could not just back up and close the door now. This was happening.

“Depends...”

He made eye contact with Jinyoung through the mirror; Jinyoung was leaning against the sinks and the sleeves of his turtleneck were rolled up, revealing his strong arms. Jaebum looked him up and down, appreciating the way his pants accentuated his thighs and butt, and then suddenly Jinyoung was turning around to face Jaebum. He tried to decipher the look on his face.

“...on what you’re reading into.”

And then Jinyoung stepped forward and Jaebum did also. Jaebum took Jinyoung’s face into his hands and kissed him hard, biting at his lips carelessly, pushing him back against the sink countertop. Jinyoung’s hands were on Jaebum’s sides, but he quickly moved them under the suit jacket, dragging his palms all over his back to pull him even more closer. He was kissing back with force and want and Jaebum pushed his tongue into Jinyoung’s mouth. He tasted like wine and sweet chilli snacks. 

“Christ, Jinyoung,” Jaebum desperately breathed out. “You drive me so crazy like this.” He pushed their hips together, or maybe it was Jinyoung, and he smiled against his lips as Jinyoung let out a soft moan. He wanted more, more of Jinyoung like this, helpless under his control.

But then there was a creaking sound coming from the door and Jaebum did the thing he wanted the least – he leapt away from Jinyoung and headed from the nearest exit, the door that had just opened. 

“Hello there,” Mark looked at him with a puzzled expression, why was Jaebum so desperate to get out?, but let Jaebum go without further investigation.

Jaebum stopped right as the door closed in the little room that led to the restrooms. What was he doing, exactly? His head was full of doubts again – Jinyoung was his employee! This was definitely a violation of something, and was there a chance that Mark had seen something? What if Jinyoung blackmails him?  _ Would he do that? Does he now think I’m a predator? _

_ This could  _ end _ Daeim. _

_ But god, did it feel  _ good.

He had no choice than to go back to his seat and chat with Youngjae, who unlike him and Yugyeom with Bambam was not on the verge of blackout drunk.

But then everything went all wrong again as Mark barged out of the restroom and headed to the table. He immediately grabbed the phone that Jinyoung had left there and looked at Jaebum to get his attention.

“Jinyoung got sick,” was all he said but it was enough for Jaebum to spring back up and rush after Mark.

“I will take care of this,” Mark turned around to say to Jaebum – after all, what was Jinyoung to Jaebum but an employee? Jaebum did not answer.

They rushed into the bathroom and Jaebum saw Jinyoung bent over the toilet seat. Jaebum suddenly felt the most sober he had felt the entire evening. He stood there weak and helpless as Mark acted, crouching down and handing the phone to Jinyoung.

Jinyoung did not take the phone, only unlocked it without even looking up to Mark. “Call Jackson,” he muttered with a distorted voice.

Mark glanced at Jaebum as he dialled the number,  _ it’s okay, let me handle this, _ and put the phone against his ear. The person at the other end picked up in almost immediately.

“Hey, this is Mark, I’m Jinyoung’s friend from work,” he said and Jaebum could not help himself but ponder on the ‘friend’. “Yeah, he had a lot to drink and now he’s throwing up. He’s asking if you could give him a lift?”

“Thanks a lot, I will keep an eye on him,” Mark ended the call and rubbed Jinyoung’s back. “Hey, your friend will be here in ten minutes.”

Jaebum heard a faint ‘thanks’ from Jinyoung. He sat down on the floor outside of the stall and sighed. He was not sure if Jinyoung was aware of his presence because he had not said anything so far, but maybe Jinyoung would not even remember this (he had secretly hoped so). Mark sat down on the opposite side of the stall, looking pretty drained as well. He sighed, hugging his knees and leaning his head against them.

He was conflicted between helping Jinyoung and leaving it up to Mark. If it were anyone else, he probably would not care to help much, after all, they were all grown adults in the office who were supposed to be responsible for themselves. But this was Jinyoung and Jaebum wanted to take care of him. Eventually, he asked a waiter for a glass of water to give him, but when he passed the glass to Jinyoung, he didn’t even look up to see who he was. Maybe it was better that way.

When Jinyoung’s friend – Jackson – arrived, he headed straight to the bathroom. He was just in sweats and a black hoodie, but it was apparent from the way he walked and the way the hoodie fit around his arms and shoulders that he was in a good shape. Jaebum couldn’t help but to feel a pang of envy – he was in no way as muscular and strong as Jackson. 

Jackson looked a little confused as he walked into the bathroom, but he quickly located where Jinyoung was. Before he could reach him Mark approached him halfway and introduced himself.

“Hi, I’m Mark,” he said and shook Jackson’s hand.

“Thanks for calling me, how is he doing?” Jackson said, not really paying attention to Mark and walking straight to Jinyoung. Jinyoung had probably heard him arrive so he was now sitting against the side of the stall, looking up tiredly at Jackson.

“I think he will be okay.” 

Jaebum decided that he should help Jinyoung to his feet, so he crouched at his side to do so. But Jackson was quick to, rather unceremoniously, push him away and kneel at Jinyoung’s side. Jaebum staggered, barely keeping himself upright.  _ Wait, is Jackson… _

“Hey Jinyoung,” Jackson muttered to Jinyoung in a soft voice. Jaebum watched as Jinyoung looked up to him teary-eyed. “Are you alright? I will take you home, yeah?”

“I’m sorry,” was all Jinyoung had managed before putting his hands around Jackson’s neck and leaning into him. Jackson shifted on his feet so he could stand up with Jinyoung. Jinyoung was able to stand by himself, but right as they stood up he sank onto Jackson, hugging him with all his weight.

“Let’s get you home, okay?”

Jaebum and Mark slowly followed the two of them outside to Jackson’s car. It was still lightly raining and Jaebum could not shake off the terrible feeling that  _ oh, Jackson is Jinyoung’s boyfriend _ . Jackson helped Jinyoung get into the passenger seat before going back around to talk to him and Mark.

“I’m sorry for this, Jinyoung usually knows his limits,” Jackson explained apologetically. “Do you maybe want a lift?” Jaebum shook his head.

“Maybe me? From what I heard I live pretty close,” Mark said and Jackson nodded.

Jaebum excused himself that he still needed to pay for everyone’s dinner and went back inside. He watched as Mark and Jackson got into the car and drove away. He immediately went to the bar to pay, called a ride for himself and left without saying goodbye to any of the people still sitting at the table. Although he had to wait a few minutes, he prefered to stand outside in the light rain alone with his own thoughts. 

  
  


Jackson tried his best to drive as comfortably as he could. Jinyoung was sitting in the passenger's seat, leaning towards the door to be more comfortable. He looked deadly tired, so Jackson put on some calm music and decided to not ask many questions. He glanced into the rearview mirror and adjusted it, catching a glimpse of Mark leaning back in the seat and rubbing his hands on his face. It was barely midnight and the two of them looked like after a full all-nighter.

They barely passed a couple of blocks when Jinyoung started getting visibly uncomfortable in his seat. Jackson understood immediately and stopped the car.

“Are you ok?”

Jinyoung did not answer and immediately opened the door to step out of the car. Jackson watched him as he bent over, supporting himself by a lamp post. He took a couple of deep breaths, but did not end up vomiting, instead just spitting out a bad spit. Jackson shuddered as the cold midnight air blew into the vehicle before Jinyoung got back into the car and shut the door.

“All good now?” Jackson asked, carefully watching him fasten his seatbelt. Jinyoung nodded and he took it as a signal that he can continue driving.

“Jackson, I’m so stupid,” Jinyoung said in a desperate voice.

“It’s not like this is your first time getting drunk, it’s alright, it’s nothing to–”

“I kissed Jaebum.”

Jackson tensed up as he looked up into the rearview mirror and his gaze met Mark’s.

“Is that a good thing or?”

“I’m not sure,” Jinyoung exhaled, resting his head on the door window. Jackson looked back at Mark. He was visibly shocked by his coworker’s confession, eyes wide and his palm covering his mouth, almost as if he was trying to stop himself from commenting on the matter. “A part of me wants to hate him for everything, for rejecting me and for wasting my time and for the fact that since I met him literally–”

“Jinyoung,” Jackson interrupted him, currently stopping at a red light. He looked at him and found him staring back at him, the traffic lights burning in his eyes. “Let’s– let’s talk about this when we get home, alright?”

Jinyoung looked away. “I’m just so angry with myself.”

They drove for the rest of the way in silence. Jackson’s mind raced with thoughts – Jinyoung openly talked about him and Jaebum in front of Mark, and why was Mark suddenly Jinyoung’s best friend when he had interrogated Jinyoung about his relationship with Jaebum just a couple of days ago? Maybe it was good that Mark was there for Jinyoung, but he also did not know him enough to be sure about his opinion on the possibility of something being between Jinyoung and Jaebum.

“I’ll drop Jinyoung off first and come back to drive you home, is that alright?” Jackson asked Mark when they finally arrived at his apartment. He unbuckled his seatbelt and turned around to look at him. Mark only nodded in agreement and let out what sounded like a bored sigh.

Jackson got out of the car and shuddered at the sudden change in temperature – the autumn was quickly turning into winter. He walked around the car to wait for Jinyoung to get out and glanced into the car again at Mark who was now taking out his phone to entertain himself in the meantime. It was something about Jinyoung’s coworker that made him curious, but he was also nervous about what he could do with the information about Jinyoung and Jaebum. And he wanted to make sure that Jinyoung got to bed safely before leaving to drop Mark off.

So before Jinyoung slammed the door to the passenger seat he stuck his head into the car to get Mark’s attention. “Or if you want to come up for tea or something? I don’t want to leave Jinyoung alone at this state.”

“Oh…” Mark was clearly caught off guard, but it did not take him long to make up his mind. “Sure, why not.”

Jackson could not help to not smile as Mark got out of the car. They walked up to the apartment while talking about Mark’s job, with Jinyoung occasionally chiming in with his own experiences in the workplace. Jackson understood that Mark was trying to climb the corporate ladder as quickly as possible, but he didn’t understand why was he rushing so much, being still very young.

Jinyoung went to take a shower – very reluctantly, at Jackson’s command and reasoning that he will feel much better in the morning if he does so – while Jackson prepared a glass of water for him and two cups of herbal tea for him and Mark.

“I feel like I should say something about…” Jackson began, already feeling a little bit awkward for having such serious conversation while not knowing Mark at all. “Well, on behalf of Jinyoung. I think he wouldn’t want you to take this wrong or hold this against him.”

“Do you mean… back in the car…?”

Jackson nodded, leaning against the kitchen counter as the kettle slowly began to boil.

“I’m– I don’t know what to think. It’s hard to not be upset.”

“Upset?”

“It’s just… I asked Jinyoung if there’s something with him and the boss because he was the only person in the whole office who he talked to. Like, really talked to, not just work talk. And now with this…”

“Well, I don’t think he told you the full truth. And I totally get that. It’s… hard to talk about these things. Anyway, we knew Jaebum back in college. Mostly he did. It was complicated, but I saw it myself, he– well, both of them. They really liked each other. Jinyoung did not even believe me, but I noticed it on Jaebum, the way he looked at him… Being with the two of them in one room felt like third-wheeling, they just understood each other so well.”

“I guess… it just did not occur to me that Mr. Im could be into guys,” Mark smiled awkwardly.

“I think what I’m trying to say is, I don’t want this to harm Jinyoung,” Jackson stared straight into Mark’s eyes, hoping to get the point across as clearly as possible. “Or Jaebum, either. I hope it’s not too much to ask.”

Mark looked away, focusing his gaze on the kitchen counter instead of Jackson. His hands were crossed across his chest and his fingers were playing with the material of his sleeves. 

When Mark did not say anything, Jackson continued. “It’s one thing to expose your coworker for having a workplace relationship. But I’m worried what hell it would open up if a word got out that a chairman of one of the biggest chaebols in Korea is gay.”

The kettle suddenly turned off so Jackson turned around to pour the hot water into the cups. Mark still did not say anything so he excused himself to go check up on Jinyoung. He was already in bed, passed out on top of his blankets, so Jackson took another one and draped it over him. He returned to find Mark sitting on a couch in the living room, holding the cup of hot tea in both hands, deep in thoughts. Jackson quietly sat down next to him with his own cup.

“This is just a lot to take in,” Mark eventually said. “I’ve been trying for so long to get somewhere. And when I see people take shortcuts to where I had to work hard to get…”

“Jinyoung got the job rightfully, I wouldn’t doubt that. From what he told me Jaebum had no idea that Jinyoung was hired. And I highly doubt that Jinyoung would do  _ this _ just to get a promotion.”

“I wanted to prove to my parents that I can take care of myself and make it big. And I want to do it as soon as possible.”

Jackson did not expect Mark to be so open with him. It scared him that Mark was stressing so much over something that he almost took for granted. A position between the higher-ups in an international company. “It’s actually much harder, you know. I don’t want to be rude, but it’s actually not as worth it as it seems.”

Mark looked at Jackson with a puzzled expression.

“My dad gave me a position as the head of the whole department. I don’t deserve it. I barely graduated from my degree and I’m supposed to lead a department? It’s a travesty. And I can’t even complain because where else would I go? … I can’t even be myself in there. I haven’t dated in what feels like years,” he looked at Mark, wondering if he understands what he means.

Jackson sighed and took a careful sip from his cup. Mark observed him in silence.

“I’m actually saving up for my own studio. I didn’t say this to Jinyoung, but if he wasn’t living there at the moment I would want to convert his room into a recording room for my own music.”

Mark’s eyes widened in surprise. “You do your own music?”

“Yeah, I actually love music. But how can I find the time for it when I’m constantly busy with work that I have no interest in? It gets me the money I need for equipment, so I just suck it up and do it. What I'm trying to say is that these higher-up positions are not worth it – maybe you get a little bit more money, but you constantly have to kiss ass just to keep the position, you get a bunch of overtime and if you don't have someone from your family keeping you there, they will sacrifice you as soon as something goes wrong and they need to put the blame on someone. I saw a dude burn himself out just by wanting to actually do what the position asked of him instead of giving the work to someone else, he did that for a year and then they demoted him when someone from his department got into a tax evasion scandal.”

“Jesus… Now when you talk about it… I should think about it more.”

“But I have a few music projects I’ve been working on, so if you ever have time you can definitely stop by and I’ll show you.”

“That sounds good.”

“Can you just… promise me?” Jackson said after a moment of silence. “Don’t say anything about Jinyoung or Jaebum at work. I really care about both of them.”

“Alright, you have my word,” Mark smiled at him and Jackson felt something move in his chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo... something finally happened between those two! I really wonder what you think of this chapter - let me know in the comments!
> 
> Follow me on [instagram](https://www.instagram.com/woosanthighs/) for updates on my writing process!
> 
> See you in the next update!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a heartbreak, on both ends

The first thing on Jinyoung’s mind as he woke up was Jaebum.

_ Oh god, I kissed him _ , was his first thought. It was already the next morning but he could still feel Jaebum on his lips, a warm tingle on the chapped skin. All of the memories came crashing down onto him like a ton of bricks so Jinyoung pulled up his blanket, hoping to shield himself from all the embarrassment. It didn’t help. He groaned and pushed his face into the mattress, trying to numb the headache.

Jinyoung didn’t remember  _ all  _ the details, but he remembered enough to put all the pieces together. The eerie silence of the men’s bathroom, the way his heart pounded inside of his chest when Jaebum entered, the sudden warmth of Jaebum’s body against his as he kissed him violently, how he struggled for breath when they pulled away. 

He turned over to lay on his back and brought a hand to his mouth, slowly dragging his index and middle finger across his bottom lip – there was a tender spot. Jaebum bit him there and Jinyoung probably did not even notice at the moment. Did he bite him out of excitement, or was that an attempt at signalling discomfort, at stopping Jinyoung?

His mind went blank at the latter thought. Hopefully, before he could ponder on it, there was a knock on his door. It was Jackson, carrying a glass of water.

“Morning,” he said, sitting on the side of his bed, “you look awful.”

“Thanks a lot,” Jinyoung muttered, “I feel awful.”

“What about your stomach?”

“Oh god, did I puke?”

“Big time,” Jackson laughed, passing the glass of water to Jinyoung as he sat up, “in front of Jaebum, too.”

Jinyoung answered with a long, desperate groan.

“Anyway, I made breakfast,” Jackson stood up as Jinyoung drank his water. He headed to the door and glanced back at him: “And why didn’t you tell me that Mark is hot? Damn, changes  _ everything _ .”

“What?” Jinyoung shouted after him, confused. He stood up, getting dizzy immediately. He fell back onto the bed and rubbed his temples with his palms. His stomach felt like it was full of plastic. Jinyoung could not believe he had gotten so drunk – the last time he had been black-out drunk was in college.

It was a little bit cold in the apartment, so he put on the first t-shirt and sweatpants he saw laying on the ground and walked into the living room. Jackson was watching some kind of reality show rerun and stuffing his face with a toast. Jinyoung could not imagine eating anything heavier than a plain piece of bread, so he just grabbed a cup of coffee that was ready for him on the table and sat down on the couch next to Jackson.

“So, how was yesterday,” Jackson asked casually, eyes glued to the show.

“You tell me,” Jinyoung sighed, “I remember arriving there, drinking a lot and… making out with Jaebum. I don’t even know how I got home.” He looked at Jackson, waiting for his reaction. To his surprise, he got none.

“Mark called me with your phone that you got sick, so I picked you up. You were in the bathroom, all three of you, Jaebum was all worried and panicked. Then in the car, you told me about kissing Jaebum,” Jackson turned to Jinyoung with a judgemental gaze before continuing, “ _ while Mark was sitting in the back _ .”

Jinyoung face-palmed himself in embarrassment. 

“Don’t worry, I talked to him about it and hopefully he won’t cause you problems.”

“Thank you,” Jinyoung said weakly.

“Is he this cute every day or was he just tipsy?”

“Jackson!”

“What? Don’t you think you should repay me by giving me his number?” he exaggerated, faking being offended.

“Shut up,” Jinyoung laughed. 

They watched the tv for a couple of minutes in silence, but Jinyoung could not really pay attention. He tried to remember more details from the previous night, slowly remembering some of the conversations from the restaurant and mental images of Jaebum, looking straight into his soul.

“What are you going to do with this… Jaebum situation?” Jackson eventually asked him.

Jinyoung had not thought about that. He took a while to answer and luckily, Jackson didn’t pressure him into giving a straight answer. When he spoke up again, it was much quieter.

“If it wasn’t for yesterday, I’d say I’m almost angry at him. I mean… I felt so stupid after trying to ask him out. And then he walks into my life like nothing happened and I’m suddenly his best friend, going to his apartment and  _ damn _ he has me totally wrapped around his finger, doesn’t he?” Panic stirred inside his chest as his voice rose. “I follow him to every lunch and do whatever he tells me to, not because he’s my boss but because otherwise, I wouldn’t have his attention. And it upsets that he has so much power over me,” he let out a shaky breath. He felt Jackson’s hand on his knee in an attempt to comfort him, but he could barely look him in the eyes.

“It doesn’t sound like he is doing that willingly, though…”

“The worst thing is… after what happened yesterday, all I want to do is quit and never see him again. If I like the attention so much, why do I sabotage myself by coming on to him?”

“Ji– Jinyoung! I think you have it all wrong, I don’t think Jaebum is manipulating you. I think... you’re still in love with him.”

“Of course!” Jinyoung almost shouted out in anger. He stopped himself and took a deep breath. Jackson was watching him with a troubled expression. Jinyoung breathed out, calming himself down. “Of course I am.”

Jackson looked into his eyes and put a hand on his shoulder, gently massaging it to comfort him. “I think you should talk to Jaebum about the kiss.”

Jinyoung nodded almost unnoticeably, taking a sip of coffee.

“How did it happen?”

“I don’t even know. I was in the bathroom and he was there too, then I just went for it. And he bit me, so I’m not sure how much he was really into it and how much was just drunk me, making the most out of the situation,” Jinyoung whined.

“Oh my god,” Jackson laughed, receiving nothing but a grumpy frown form Jinyoung. “That’s cute, I think you’re reading too much into it. Jaebum was so panicked yesterday, I don’t think he was offended. You should’ve seen him, he was a total deer in the headlights. I mean, imagine if you kissed someone and their reaction was to puke,” Jackson kept laughing, but Jinyoung did not reciprocate.

“Do you think there’s any chance for me?” Jinyoung asked weakly when Jackson stopped laughing and focused on his toast again.

“I think Jaebum likes you too. You just need to find a way to each other, because it seems to me that neither of you really know how to approach the other.”

Jackson was absolutely right. Jinyoung had pride, and maybe it was the pride that clouded his vision – maybe Jaebum was not as selfish as Jinyoung made him out to be. When he attempted to ask Jaebum out in college, it took all of his courage to do so. He still remembered how nervous he had been, walking up the stairs towards where Jaebum’s classroom was. He felt like there was an anvil tied to his ribcage that pulled him down with every step he took. He still had time, the class was not supposed to end in the next twenty minutes, so Jinyoung sat down onto a bench opposite to the lecture hall.

But as soon as he sat down, the door burst open as Jaebum hurried out of the room, barely even noticing Jinyoung. He immediately stood back up, blocking Jaebum’s way.

“Hi, can I talk to you?” he said, breaking through the anxiety.

“Hey, what is it,” Jaebum said, focusing most of his attention on his phone texting someone. It was barely a question, more like a mere acknowledgement.

“I just thought…” Jinyoung stuttered, looking for the right words. Jaebum met his gaze, fondly exasperated. “I really enjoy spending time with you, so I wanted to ask you out on a date.”

There it was, Jinyoung’s heart on a silver plate, all for Jaebum to see. The weight on Jinyoung’s chest suddenly disappeared, replaced by a shot of adrenaline rushing through his veins.

“If you wanted,” he muttered. Jaebum did not reply and the silence hung between them, slowly pushing them apart. What followed, Jaebum’s words were laced with lead and buried right into Jinyoung’s chest.

“ _ Don’t you think this is a little rude? _ ” Jinyoung repeated quietly what Jaebum had said that day.

“You can’t beat yourself up for that,” Jackson comforted him. “We barely even knew he was an heir to Daeim.”

“You know what, put the news on. I can’t miss out on more than I already did.”

Jackson changed the channel but did not drop the topic. “Jinyoung, you couldn’t have known that his mother had died that day.” Jinyoung sighed. Jackson always knew what to say, unlike him. 

They watched the news in silence and Jinyoung started to realize why he never watched them – he got bored almost immediately.

“So, Mark, hm?”

Jackson did not hesitate. “He is  _ so cute _ .”

“I suspected he would be your type. Are you gonna ask him out?”

“Well, still depends on if you give me his number,” Jackson teased. “But I’m actually considering taking it slow. I’m… I think I want to get to know him first.”

Jinyoung wanted to ask more, but suddenly the bell rang and the two of them exchanged a confused look. It was a Saturday and neither of them was expecting anyone. Jackson put down his plate of food and got up, heading towards the door. Jinyoung heard him talk to someone over the intercom, but did not understand a word.

“Well, speaking of,” Jackson said as he walked back to the living room. Jinyoung noticed how he had tensed up.

“Who is it?”

“Jaebum.”

“Fuck,” Jinyoung panicked, “what does he want?”

“He says you forgot your wallet at the restaurant.”

“Why now…” he sighed. This was not the best time, everything was still fresh, too raw. “I’m not ready.”

“It will be alright,” Jackson tried to calm him down. “If it gets awkward, I can help you.”

He could barely organize his thoughts when there was a knock on the door. Jackson went to open it and then there he was – Jaebum standing in the middle of the living room, still in a coat with his cheeks blushed from the freezing cold outside. Jinyoung suddenly felt underdressed. Jaebum was not in his business attire, but he was still much more dressed up in black jeans and a designer hoodie than Jinyoung was in his sweatpants, a shirt that should have been washed two days ago and halfway buried under a fluffy blanket.

“Hey,” he said, struggling to meet his gaze. Was Jaebum nervous? “How do you feel?”

“H– Hi,” Jinyoung cleared his throat, pulling the blanket closer to his body. “Much better than yesterday.”

Every silent second felt like an eternity and Jinyoung wondered if Jaebum could sense that as well. “That’s good, I’m– I’m glad.” Another couple of seconds and Jinyoung was in agony. Why did Jaebum look so good with a hangover? “You forgot this yesterday.”

Jaebum handed him his wallet and Jinyoung took it without standing up. He glanced inside to check if everything was still in place and wondered:  _ How much does Jaebum remember? _

“I also brought this,” Jaebum showed them a paper bag from Jinyoung’s favourite bakery. “I noticed you often have it for breakfast so I…,” he hesitated, before setting the bag down on the table and sitting down on an armchair almost opposite to Jinyoung. “I wanted to talk.”

Jinyoung’s heart sank as he glanced at Jackson who was now sitting next to him on the couch. He swallowed. “What about?”

Jaebum’s eyes darted to Jackson and then back at Jinyoung, staring deep into his eyes. “I think we should talk alone.”

“Jaebum, I– I don’t think I want to–”

“No! I think,” Jackson interrupted him, putting a hand on his knee, “you should talk, definitely.”

“Listen, I don’t want to cause problems, I just want to explain–”

“This is not the best time,” Jinyoung blurted out. Jackson got up to leave the two alone, but Jaebum immediately stood up as well, straightening his shoulders and taking a step back. 

“Alright, sorry, I’ll– I’ll let myself out,” Jaebum backed up, putting his palms to his chest in defence. Jinyoung stood up – he had no plan, but somehow his feet carried him after Jaebum, who was now heading back to the door.

“Don’t take this the wrong way, I…” he had no idea what he was saying at that point, but he felt like he needed to say something. Jaebum turned to face him as he put on his shoes. Jackson was out of sight.

“Listen, I have no intention of getting between the two of you, I just– I wanted to make sure we… we’re on the same page.”

“Jaebum, I’m not–”

“Don’t–” he interrupted him, hand on the door handle. “You don’t have to explain. I hope you will feel better soon. And… I’m glad Jackson was there for you yesterday.” Jaebum opened the door and headed out, but before he closed it, he looked over his shoulder to face Jinyoung. He did not look at him, however. Then he spoke up, much quieter this time: “I was just being stupid, sorry. I drank too much, so don’t… read into it.”

  
  
  


Jinyoung would have liked for things to be the same after that, but as soon as he walked outside and saw one particular bakery in the distance he was instantly reminded of the past events by a twist in his stomach. In the office, everyone seemed much friendlier, especially Mark who now started talking to him much more.

But it was hard to accept how much it broke his heart when Jaebum stopped talking to him. He barely looked his way during meetings and he no longer asked him to lunches. Jinyoung had thought about asking him, but there was always an excuse to not to – he started going to lunches with Youngjae, Yugyeom and Bambam. The youngers always made it fun, constantly teasing each other about something and discussing office gossip; Jinyoung had learned much more about his co-workers just through the gossip than through any of the conversations he had attempted at. 

Jinyoung also finally got into the habit of reading the news, especially when it concerned some of the big companies in Korea. He did go through some tabloids as well and eventually found out that Bambam was an expert on entertainment industry news, so sometimes he just asked him about what was new and was quickly briefed on the most important scandals and speculations of the day.

Of course, neither his or Jaebum’s attitude prevented awkward interactions, like when Jaebum would direct a question at him during a meeting and their eyes met for a fleeting moment, the air still and dense for Jinyoung to hear his own heartbeat. Jaebum still addressed everyone in the office by their last name so when “Mr. Park” echoed through the room it was like a kick into Jinyoung’s stomach. 

It had been barely two weeks after their kiss when Jinyoung hurried towards a closing elevator only to find out that the only person inside was Jaebum. He struggled to catch his breath as he made eye contact, almost stumbling into the depth of Jaebum’s gaze. He forced a smile and pressed the button of the topmost floor, although it had already been pressed. “Hi,” he said and stood beside him.

“Good morning,” Jaebum said and looked at his watch. “Jinyoung.”

Jinyoung felt his heart skip a beat. He heard Jaebum take a short breath, almost as to say something, but he did not and left Jinyoung wondering what it was on the tip of his tongue. He thought about what could happen if he just took a step forward, if he told Jaebum right then and there that he liked him and kissed him up against the elevator wall. He felt the tips of his ears heat up at the thought, so he quickly dismissed it. 

The silence quickly became awkward. “I miss our lunches,” Jinyoung suddenly blurted out, just to say something.

Jaebum moved his torso to partially face him and their eyes met. “Yeah, I’ve been busy…” he said with a sigh. “How’s Jackson doing, everything good?”

“Yeah it’s alright,” Jinyoung said. “Recently he’s been doing a lot of overtimes so we don’t talk as much, though.”

“Well, as long as it doesn’t get between the two of you.”

It did not feel like their usual chat, it was small talk, Jinyoung realized.

It was another week after that when Jaebum called Jinyoung to his office almost immediately after he came into work that morning. Jinyoung immediately knew that something was wrong just by the fact that it was Jaebum himself who came in front of his desk to request him, not his assistant or the receptionist.

“Good morning,” he said to him and Mark, his gaze lingering on both of them. He had hands in his pockets, but he was obviously tensed up. “ _ Mr. Park _ , see me in my office as soon as possible, please. There’s something you should know.”

Jinyoung looked at him, speechless. Jaebum immediately turned around and left. Jinyoung turned to look at Mark who was equally as puzzled. 

“What do you think it’s about?” 

“No idea,” Jinyoung said, running his hand through his hair. Mark, contrary to Jinyoung’s first impression of him, slowly turned into one of his best friends in the company after the dinner. There was this unspoken bond between them and Mark’s knowledge of his odd relationship with the chairman made a lot of things easier – Jinyoung finally felt like he was not all by himself, he finally had true emotional support in the workplace, albeit unvoiced. 

Jinyoung sighed as he saved the document he had been working on and stood up. He ran his hands down his trousers to straighten them and as he walked towards the chairman office he fidgeted with his tie in attempts to fix it. He knocked on the door briefly before letting himself in.

Jaebum was sitting in an armchair with legs crossed as he looked up at Jinyoung. He gave him a polite smile before motioning to the couch next to him. 

“I’m gonna get straight to the point,” he breathed out, his gaze focused on the material of the armrest as he run his fingers across it. “Yesterday evening I had a dinner meeting at this one Chinese restaurant. I saw Jackson there. He was with Mark.” He looked at Jinyoung, waiting for a reaction. “I– I don’t want to cross any boundaries by saying this, but I’m pretty sure it was a date.”

Jinyoung was completely speechless. Had he been so completely absorbed by his own self-pity he did not notice that his best friend and flatmate was talking to his coworker? 

“Listen, I don’t want this to seem…” Jaebum said when Jinyoung did not say anything, only staring at him with eyes wide in shock. “Wait, why are you smiling?”

“Oh my god,” Jinyoung laughed, covering his mouth with his hand. “This is… this is the best news. Jackson had been single for so long I–”

“Wait, Jinyoung!” It was now Jaebum who was in shock as he sat up in his seat and extended his hand, almost as to physically stop Jinyoung from talking. “Wait, you– you are– Jackson isn’t… you’re not dating?”

Jinyoung gave him a confused look. “Jaebum, I… Jackson is my best friend.”

Jaebum bit his lip and looked away, his brows furrowed. He stood up and paced around the room before standing in front of the window behind his desk. Jinyoung looked at him and he turned around, hands in his pockets as he watched the street below him. Jinyoung stood up and followed Jaebum to the desk, leaning against it.

“I live with him because I nearly became homeless at one point and he offered me a spare room,” Jinyoung explained quietly. He rubbed his thumbs across the edges of the desk, looking down at his feet. “But even in college, nothing ever happened, I don’t… I don’t see Jackson that way. And that’s mutual.”

“Then why…” Jaebum began but then stopped, holding his breath for a while before letting out a sigh. “I thought I almost ruined it,” he said, almost a whisper.

Jinyoung did not say anything, scared to break the moment, afraid that Jaebum could change his mind and stop talking.

“Back then when I came into your apartment, I was completely sure that Jackson sensed something. I wanted to do the least damage control I could manage at that point, fuck, I was terrified. I thought you– I thought you were angry. I thought that the very second I would get in your way you would run to the HR, or worse, the press and give them a story.”

“What do you… Jaebum, I would have no evidence on anything.”

Jaebum turned around and gave Jinyoung a dirty look. “Do you really think they  _ need _ evidence?”

Jinyoung kept silent after that, burying his gaze back down into the floor. However, Jaebum did not say anything either, leaning against the window, looking at the ceiling. “I was never upset with you,” Jinyoung eventually managed. “If anything, I was upset with myself.”

Jaebum slowly took a step forward until he was barely a foot away from him. Jinyoung looked at him and their eyes met. Jaebum was looking down on him and Jinyoung suddenly felt small. “Do you think it was a mistake?”

_ It _ . Jaebum didn’t specify  _ what _ was the mistake and Jinyoung wondered if perhaps he was afraid that saying it out loud would make him relive the scenario.

Jinyoung took a while to answer, now hyper-aware of their proximity and the electricity in the air. He wondered if Jaebum could hear his heartbeat. “I’m not sure.”

It definitely  _ felt _ like a mistake – a brief moment when Jinyoung let himself be carried away by his intoxicated, horny mind, something that shouldn’t have mattered at all but in the end, tore the earth beneath them and put a gaping ravine of silence and doubt between him and Jaebum.

Jaebum exhaled and broke the eye contact. For a split second, Jinyoung thought he’s going to close the gap between them, but instead Jaebum put his hands right next to him on the desk. Jinyoung hung down his head and glanced sideways – Jaebum was gripping the table while leaning against it, and the space between his palms was just about the size of his torso; he wondered what would happen if he stood there instead. 

“God,” Jaebum muttered. “You’re so cold I could burn myself.”

Jinyoung was taken aback. He had been told previously that he was being difficult, but that was at times when he was genuinely not interested.

“Everything is just too sudden, I feel like I’m losing myself.”  _ In you. _

Jaebum was silent for a moment and Jinyoung could focus on nothing but the steady rhythm of his breath. He eventually sat beside him, looking out of the window in front of them. When he finally spoke up, it was much quieter and there was something Jinyoung rarely heard in Jaebum’s voice, some kind of tenderness. 

“With the company and my parents rarely talking to me about anything else, I never felt like there was someone who cared too much about the rest. But when I started spending time with you, I felt like I finally had  _ someone _ . I mean, we never talked about business or money or fame. I guess that’s part of the coldness, but at the same time, that’s what I needed, in a way.” He paused for a bit and glanced at Jinyoung with a look in his eyes that he could not decipher. He bit his lip like if he was trying to stop the words from coming out. “Now with my parents gone and old coworkers somewhere else, you’re all I have.”

Jinyoung looked away, biting at the inside of his cheek as his head spun.

“I don’t need answers, in the end,” he said as a relief. “I need… I need you,  _ here _ .”

Jinyoung looked at their hands, barely an inch apart. Was Jaebum confessing?

There was a knock at the door and Jaebum turned his head to the side to look.

“Mr. Im, Mr. Jung from marketing is here for the meeting,” Yugyeom’s voice echoed through the office. Jinyoung stood up to leave, walking towards the exit.

“Mr. Park,” Jaebum uttered, voice back to its usual business tone. “At least… think about it.”

Jinyoung turned around, his gaze meeting Jaebum’s. He gave him a slight nod and bowed before leaving. He did not acknowledge Yugyeom’s questioning look and when he came back to his desk, he avoided Mark’s attempts at addressing the topic. He would need to think, first.

_ You’re all I have _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was something, am I right? The backstory with Jaebum, Markson kinda gets together?, the office scene...  
> I'm really curious what you guys think. Let me know in comments!
> 
> Also, I'm really sorry for taking this long to update. The fact is, I still don't have the last one or two chapters so I was getting stressed over it, also my life is really hectic right now and I hadn't been in a good mindset for posting anything. Hopefully, life will go back to normal soon and I'll get inspired to write. 
> 
> See you in the next one!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it has to go wrong before it can get better; but does it really get better?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SO SORRY for being incredibly late with this update. The truth is, I got caught up with a ton of work for school and only on Monday I finally finished all of my finals (I got the best mark on almost all of them aaaa), so now I can focus on writing again.
> 
> ALSO: in this chapter, things get spicy again. Explicit description of sexual activities, but nothing too kinky. Consider yourself warned, in case you're not comfortable with such scenes. Despite that, I lowered the rating to Mature - after all, the explicit scenes are not crucial to the plot and the themes are much lighter than in other E-rated fics too (no violence etc).

Jaebum didn’t have any meetings that afternoon, so he decided to head home early. He felt tired and strangely relieved – he would have expected to feel overwhelmed by feelings, but instead, he felt like a weight had been pulled off his chest and he could finally breathe. So he put on some calming music in his apartment, turned off his phone notifications and poured himself a drink, deciding to pick up a book to distract himself completely. He read till the sunset and lit up his living room in peachy orange. Before he fell asleep he thought about a pair of eyes and the kiss that had almost changed everything.

He sensed it right the next morning as he woke up. Jaebum forgot to set his alarm so he got up a little later than usual and his phone was already blown up with messages and missed calls. There were journalists swarmed around his building’s entrance and around the office building, so he could barely get into work without being physically assaulted with cameras. Jaebum wondered if he had already been desensitized to the crowds or if all the noise kept him calm because he had always expected it. He did, in fact, expect  _ this _ , but he was still surprised by the intensity – what had happened this time?

Right as the elevator arrived into the office it was Bambam who ran right towards him with his phone in hand as a couple of other employees stood up as well.

“Sir, have you read–” he passed him the phone, showing a news article. Right as Jaebum took the phone to read the headline the entire office went silent.

“ _ Daeim’s new chairman Im Jaebum rumoured to be dating a male employee – nepotism or disgusting abuse of power? _ ” Jaebum read the title out loud to the entire office as he felt his insides implode.  _ No, not this _ , he cursed in his head and as he looked up his gaze instantly met Jinyoung’s. He knew he couldn’t linger on it for too long, so he pursed his lips and looked around at his other subordinates.

Everyone was silent for that one moment. Jaebum handed the phone back to Bambam and took a deep breath, hoping that he doesn’t look nervous or moved at all. “You read that crap?” he muttered to him. Then he turned to speak to everyone. 

“This was issued by a news company that belongs to our competitor, you could’ve researched that. Earlier this month they dropped patent infringement accusations on Daeim, we took it to court and they threatened us with blackmail. We went with it anyway and now I guess this is what they produced to try to scare us.”

The room slowly came alive with whispers. Jaebum felt Jinyoung’s gaze on him and although he tried his best to not look he noticed how Mark said something to him to which Jinyoung responded with a shrug and a look that said “let’s not talk about this”.

“Sir,” a woman in the back of the room put up her hand, “so is it true?” The entire office fell silent as everyone looked back at Jaebum. “Are you dating someone?”

Jaebum knew it was a pretty valid question and that he would have to have an answer to it, especially for the press. And he had, in fact, a truthful answer – no, he wasn’t dating anyone. But it was all still so fresh, so raw. He felt vulnerable. 

“What do you think,” he retorted bitterly.  _ Why do I have to share my relationship status with these people? Why do they care? _ He felt his chest constrict. No one said anything. He held his breath. “It’s nothing but a rumour.”

He scanned the room. His employees were either staring into the floor or quietly whispering to each other.  _ Are they gossiping? About me? _ Jaebum was about to dismiss the impromptu meeting, already sick of the judgement in the air when he noticed Bambam next to him take a breath as if he wanted to speak up. He shifted his weight from one leg to the other as Jaebum looked at him expectantly.

“What is then…” Bambam began nervously, “what is– well, what is your opinion on…” He gestured vaguely, but Jaebum understood the question well enough.

“If you’re asking about my opinion on dating a coworker, I personally do not care about that. You should be asking the HR.” He was proud of his answer – it was indeed his opinion on any kind of relationships in the workplace but it also diverted the attention from his own situation to a general rule. Bambam too seemed to be satisfied with the reply, so he nodded and his gaze fell to the floor.

“Alright then, I’ll be in my office,” Jaebum concluded the meeting, turning around on his heels to walk away. 

As soon as he sat down, he opened the article on his computer. The main evidence was photos of him and a man with his face blurred out but it was painfully obvious it was Jinyoung. It was photos of them on their lunches, taken at ambiguous angles and even a picture of Jinyoung going to the building where Jaebum lived. It was far-fetched for the most part, but it was scary how the article justified it like it was the only logical conclusion. The main picture was of them walking side by side where the editor made a big red circle around their hands – from the blurry shot it almost looked like they were holding them. 

Jaebum sighed, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms. He had already gotten messages from the PR department about scheduling a press release. There was no time for feelings, no time to even process what was  _ actually happening _ , Jaebum was just thrown into the situation almost as a puppet – why was it him, the puppet? He was the chairman so how did he of all people become the object of extortion? It all made sense, of course, but why was there no way out? Why had he never been given the choice to opt out?

He hated it, despised it, but there wasn’t even time for loathing the situation. He had to bite the bullet and go out there, tell the press there is nothing going on between him and his employees, tell them he will make sure that new company policies will further prevent harassment in the workplace, answer to all of their prying questions with fabricated responses that wouldn’t even mean anything. It almost felt like it was this intricate scheme to distract Jaebum from really mattered.

Jinyoung tried to go about his day as nothing happened but all it took was a glance at any of his coworkers who looked at him with so much pity it made him physically sick. He ignored Jackson’s messages, Mark’s knowing looks, not because it did not affect him but because they were all so right – Jinyoung was supposed to be devastated by this because how was he ever going to get closer to Jaebum if the entire country was watching?

So he did what he could the best – repressed the intrusive thoughts and tried to bury himself in work assignments. It helped. Everyone eventually left him alone and even when he turned on the live stream of Daeim’s press release and the office surrounded his desk to watch, no one asked him about how he felt, no one noticed how it hurt him to see Jaebum being interrogated about his private life or how all of it was actually about getting the stocks back up rather than going into the ambiguities of their relationship. 

No one from the office was ever supposed to know about how Jinyoung felt.

Jinyoung stayed in the office longer than anyone else. Mark told him he has a date with Jackson, so he figured it would be better to not come back home until much later just to save himself the trauma of walking in on them. Eventually, he was the only one left in the office, which was now oddly quiet and would be completely dark if it weren’t for Jinyoung’s desk lamp and the lit up city below him. He stretched his arms out and let out a long exhale – he had been working on an assignment for two hours now, which was definitely more difficult when there was no one who could answer his questions about specific details. He squinted at the bright screen as if a dirty look could convince the assignment to do itself.

It was almost 8 pm so he eventually decided to just close the document and opened social media to distract himself. But everything there was about the  _ newest, hottest scandal _ , Jinyoung scoffed. So he signed off and looked around the office. There was a soft light coming from the chairman office.

Jinyoung stood up, put on his coat and collected his things to leave. He walked all the way to the elevator and lifted his hand to press the button, but suddenly he heard a faint noise from the chairman office and his mind went blank. It was probably just a shuffling of papers, but it cut through the silence of the dark hall too clearly for Jinyoung to overhear. He let out a silent sigh – he had avoided Jaebum for the entire day and this was what would bring him to his office?

The mere fact that he now  _ couldn’t _ was enough to make him want to  _ try. _

He tilted his head back, closing his eyes and furrowing his brows as if it shielded him from the real world. Well, it was probably for the best to address the matter right away, right? To not just bottle it up and hope no one would open it again when it has already rotten, to not do the same mistake again. Jinyoung turned around on his heels and headed to the door that has been left ajar, letting soft yellow light seep into the hall.

Jinyoung realized Jaebum was a lot like that – rough around the edges, with sharp cheekbones and uncompromising demands, but also soft on the inside and only occasionally letting it seep out through his rare smiles and tender looks.

He knocked lightly on the wooden door, unintentionally letting it open a little bit more. He pushed the door open and his gaze fell on Jaebum sitting on the couch, reading through some documents. Jaebum looked up at him and gave him a faint smile.

“Hi,” Jinyoung managed as he stuck his hands into the pockets of his coat. “I didn’t know the chairman has to do overtime,” he chuckled, trying to set a light atmosphere. It was a stupid thing to say and Jinyoung realized that right as the words left his mouth, but someone had to break the ice.

Jaebum smiled a little bit more and lifted the document he had been reading a little bit so Jinyoung would see it. He glanced down at the text. “The legal department is considering a defamation claim and it’s just up to me to pull the trigger.”

Jinyoung didn’t expect the conversation to go straight to the point so he was left speechless, staring at Jaebum. But then Jaebum looked up at him again and he knew he had to say  _ something _ , really anything, just to release some of the tension in the air. One second. Two seconds.  _ Think _ .

“I’m…”  _ Wow, this is what you come up with? _ “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I… If it wasn’t for me, none of this would’ve happened.”

Jaebum sighed. “You can’t think about it like that. From what I learned so far, you can’t let the press win over your emotions.”

“Well… what if it already won?”

“What do you mean?”

Jinyoung looked at Jaebum who was staring at him with an expression he didn’t understand. It almost looked like if he was in pain, but there was once again the strange softness in his gaze that made Jinyoung sure that he could trust Jaebum with his whole life. He decided to step further into the room and sit on the same couch next to Jaebum, leaving quite some space between them but tilting his knees in Jaebum’s direction so he would face him.

“Yesterday, I… I really tried to think of an answer to give you. You were really honest with me and I felt really bad for keeping everything to myself. And I think I even came up with something, but now… it feels useless. No matter what I say, with what happened today, I don’t think it makes a difference.”

“Why?”

Jinyoung didn’t answer. Jaebum’s gaze was burning deep into his soul.

“What would you tell me if it wasn’t for what happened today?”

Jinyoung opened his mouth to say something but hesitated. He took a moment to study Jaebum’s face, his eyes, the two moles above his left eye, his nose, his mouth, the curve of his lips, taking it all in as if it were the last chance he would get to see them.

Finally, he spoke up. “I guess I just miss college. And I hate being like  _ this _ with you, having to speak to you formally with other people around, talking to you like I don’t know you because sometimes it does feel like that. You hide in your office the entire day or in meetings and when you speak to my coworkers you don’t sound like yourself. And I hate that we don’t talk as much anymore because I miss– I miss you. The real you. And it hurts  _ so much _ because now I have to see you every day and pretend like I’m–”

Jaebum patiently listened, waiting for Jinyoung to continue, but suddenly the words didn’t want to come out.

Jaebum’s gaze was suddenly too much to handle,  _ way too much _ . Jinyoung closed his eyes and took a deep breath as one does before jumping into the water, not sure how deep it is or if there aren’t any sharp rocks right under the surface that would tear him apart at impact. 

“Pretend like I’m over you.”

He opened his eyes to find Jaebum looking down between his feet, arms leaning against his legs and hands folded together. “But I thought… you were being cold,” Jaebum said, audibly confused.

“I like you. And for the most part, I don’t even realize I’m being cold, but I think that’s just my way of hiding how much I actually care.”

Jaebum turned his head to glance at him and their eyes met.

“But none of that matters now, anyway. You literally just told the entire country you’re not looking to date anyone any time soon,” Jinyoung said as an afterthought and heard himself going cold again. He sounded like he was blaming Jaebum for it.

Jaebum rubbed his hands across his face in frustration and Jinyoung could feel the tension in the air between them. Suddenly Jaebum was straightening up in his seat and scooting closer to Jinyoung. He put his hand on his shoulder and Jinyoung felt his stomach drop as his heartbeat picked up a pace. Jaebum looked at him with a pained expression and  _ oh, they were close _ . Jaebum’s focus shifted on his shoulder and Jinyoung felt as he rubbed the material of his coat between his fingers. He watched in silence as Jaebum’s expression turned soft again as he moved his palm to his neck and Jinyoung wondered if he could perhaps feel his rapid pulse.

Jinyoung didn’t think anything could have ever prepared him for the moment when Jaebum looked up to meet his gaze. 

“Jinyoung,” he muttered in a husky voice that always made Jinyoung so weak. “I don’t care about what the entire world thinks. Fuck that.”

Jinyoung glanced down at Jaebum’s lips that were suddenly so close, so reachable, and his mind went completely blank as he spoke up, so quietly, only for Jaebum to hear. “Then kiss me.”

Jaebum did not waste a second as he closed the gap between them. 

Compared to their first time in the restaurant this kiss was much softer and not at all rushed, it wasn’t bruising, it was warm and soft and Jaebum’s lips tasted of sweet coffee. Jinyoung kissed him back and brought his hand to cup Jaebum’s cheek. He exhaled as he felt the tip of Jaebum’s tongue slide over his bottom lip and his hand press on the back of his neck to bring him even closer. 

He let Jaebum slide his tongue inside his mouth and almost  _ whimpered _ at the feeling, now very much sober to properly  _ feel _ , but at the same time drunk on the very realization that  _ this was actually happening _ , that he had Jaebum kissing him just like that after office hours, like if it were the most natural thing that he could feel Jaebum’s hot breath against his mouth, to feel his hands sliding under his coat and suit jacket and around his waist, grabbing his hips at the very chance that he could perhaps be even closer to him.

So Jinyoung did not hold back and grazed his teeth over Jaebum’s bottom lip before he felt a ball of warmth pool in his abdomen at the sound of Jaebum letting out a barely audible moan. He kissed Jaebum some more, with tongue and a little bit of teeth, trying to get more sounds from Jaebum’s mouth as a personal challenge. He didn’t expect Jaebum to be so needy but he had no problem with giving, so he shifted on the couch and managed to straddle Jaebum’s thighs without disconnecting their mouths. 

He immediately felt Jaebum’s hands move a little further down onto his thighs. Jinyoung was admittedly nervous about making out with his boss, with the chairman of one of the biggest companies in Korea, right in his public office where anyone could walk in, but Jaebum definitely did not mind as he slid his hands over Jinyoung’s bottom, squeezing him a little bit. Jinyoung reacted by moving even closer to Jaebum and suddenly felt  _ Jaebum _ , through his slacks, fully hard. He gasped into his mouth as he felt his own erection rub against him and for the shortest moment he pulled away to look at Jaebum. He opened his eyes to meet his gaze, mouth ajar and lips blushed dark pink and wet, the pupils of his eyes blown up in lust staring back at him. 

“We…” he managed, voice raspy. “We shouldn’t do this in your office.”

He carefully watched Jaebum as he closed his eyes and furrowed his brows. He bit his lip and slowly exhaled. “I guess you’re right.”

Jinyoung dragged his thumb across Jaebum’s cheek, barely grasping that he is allowed to do so, in a moment of utter silence. Jinyoung’s heart pounded in his chest and he could barely contain himself when Jaebum was  _ right there _ , in his arms, melting under his touch alone and his eyes sparkling with “more, please”, and who was Jinyoung to deny him of it?

_ Fuck the world _ , he reminded himself as he put his thumb on Jaebum’s bottom lip, covered in spit with his tongue peeking through from behind his teeth, and oh if that alone didn’t make Jinyoung absolutely feral, drunk on the thought of that tongue touching his skin and those teeth marking it in all the right places, Jaebum knocked the air out of his lungs when he stuck out his tongue to tease Jinyoung’s thumb into his mouth, circling around it and sucking on it just the right amount to send a spark straight into his crotch that Jinyoung could do nothing but moan and roll down his hips in the most obscene way. And if that was just a spark then what came next was fireworks, Jaebum managing to thrust upwards as he caught Jinyoung’s lip with his teeth and sucked on it; and Jaebum liked it that way,  _ obscene _ , with teeth and a lot of tongue, opening Jinyoung’s mouth and licking into it like it was the last thing he would do, kissing his lips with determination to make it feel good and Jinyoung cursed at himself for wasting so much time by not doing  _ this _ .

“Fuck, Jinyoung,” Jaebum breathed out when he dared a little bit more with his hand sliding down between them to palm at Jaebum’s dick through his pants. Jaebum moved his hands under the jacket of Jinyoung’s suit to take it off along with the coat to throw it to the side. So Jinyoung dared some more, now both of his hands at Jaebum’s waist, undoing his belt and nearly breaking the material of his pants as he opened the fly and it was quite the task with Jaebum’s mouth at his jaw and neck, kissing and licking and biting, hands pulling at his hair the slightest amount to make sure Jinyoung would look absolutely  _ wrecked _ after this.

It would be a gross understatement to say Jinyoung enjoyed it – it was a strange power trip, because Jinyoung wasn’t technically the one in control, it was very much Jaebum and it had always been Jaebum with his money and power and authority, but it was also Jinyoung who drew out deep moans out of Jaebum’s mouth as he touched him, finally skin on skin as he took Jaebum’s cock in his hand and started to tease the head with his thumb. He was proud of himself, it had been quite a while since he was with someone and yet he managed to make Jaebum bite into the skin right below the collar of his shirt in attempts to silence his moans in the quiet office. 

Jinyoung couldn’t help but to think about whether it was safe to do  _ this _ right then and there, if it would get them into trouble if anyone overheard not to mention walked in on them, so he silently hoped that if anyone were to intrude they would first hear the elevator ring, and picked up a faster rhythm with his fist. But he was also greedy and just his hand wasn’t enough anymore, so he pulled away and for a second he could see a hint of panic in Jaebum’s eyes, fearing that maybe he changed his mind, but then Jinyoung slid down to kneel on the carpet in front of Jaebum, in between his knees, and there was a fire in Jaebum’s eyes as he watched him take his entire length into his mouth he almost choked. Jinyoung backed up to lick around his cock, sucking on the head and circling his tongue around it, enjoying how Jaebum couldn’t help but to curse between his moans. He teased him by leaving little kisses on the tip, licking slowly around the head and covering it with a filthy amount of spit that trickled down his wrist, and it was obvious that Jaebum loved it, hand going to Jinyoung’s already messy hair to pull his face closer and whispering Jinyoung’s name between his pornographic moans.

“You look so good like this,” he muttered and Jinyoung knew his eyes were on him. “You have no idea how much I imagined this,” Jaebum said, brushing his hand through Jinyoung’s hair and Jinyoung could relate so much so he picked up a rhythm, sliding up and down Jaebum’s cock as he became highly aware of how hard he himself was and he wondered if he could come untouched like that, just on the sight of Jaebum alone and the weight of him inside his mouth.

It didn’t take him too long to make Jaebum gasp for air as he tugged on his hair to signal him he was close, unable to even moan out of sheer pleasure, but Jinyoung didn’t back up, swallowing around his length as he tipped him over the edge, and he was aware that the carpet was probably expensive so when Jaebum came down his throat he swallowed all of it, licking him clean as he watched him, committing the sight to memory.

Jinyoung pulled away to straighten his back and take a couple of proper breaths but before he could register what was happening Jaebum was zipping up his pants and kneeling down in front of him, hands going straight to his belt to undo it and hastily taking Jinyoung’s painfully hard cock into his fist, not wasting any second. Jinyoung was a whimpering mess in a matter of seconds, waves of pleasure suddenly crashing into him as Jaebum licked into his mouth and it was absolutely filthy and  _ hot _ with Jaebum’s come still on his tongue as Jinyoung moaned into his mouth, his own mouth being too spent and fucked out to move.

“Fuck,  _ Jinyoungie _ ,” Jaebum muttered and Jinyoung opened his eyes to meet his gaze, because Jaebum just somehow  _ knew _ what kind of effect that had on him. “So pretty,” he muttered into his ear and tugged on his earlobe with his teeth and Jinyoung wondered if he knew how much he loved being called that, not  _ handsome _ or  _ attractive _ , but  _ pretty _ ; he figured he’d love being called anything if it was coming from Jaebum.

Jaebum grabbed a bunch of tissues from the small table beside them shortly before Jinyoung came down his wrist, grabbing onto the material of Jaebum’s shirt to pull him even closer, gasping for air and letting Jaebum handle him as he leaned his head on his shoulder to let out a series of quiet moans, coming down from the high.

Jinyoung sank down onto the ground after Jaebum helped him to clean up. He pulled up his underwear and pants, but his fingers were  _ trembling _ so much he didn’t bother with the fly, leaning his head against the couch to process what had just happened. Jaebum was no different, sitting right next to him. His mind was pretty much blank, too tired to form actual thoughts, but as he sat there in complete silence the air grew tense with a simple question. It crept up on him slowly as he felt a light touch on his pinky finger, slowly coming closer until half of his hand was under Jaebum’s palm, so light and tender he could barely feel it in the post-orgasmic haze, but it was undoubtedly there:  _ Where do we go from this? _

  
  
  


It began just like that – Jinyoung would return home in silence, the apartment almost completely dark apart from a sliver of light coming from under Jackson’s door and an extra pair shoes in the entryway. He wouldn’t talk to Jackson about what happened with Jaebum, because how would he even start?, and Jackson would tell him about how his date with Mark went and how utterly smitten he was with the man and Jinyoung wondered if Jackson was in love but would never dare to question his own feelings.

Jinyoung would stay overtime almost every day just to spend the time with Jaebum and while they would take the opportunity to touch each other, some days they would just talk over a glass of some expensive alcohol Jaebum had gotten from a business partner. And on the same couch, they would have weekly meetings with the office and it was almost like an inside joke between the two of them, the sheer fact that nobody knew or at least seemed to suspect that there was something between the chairman and him, they would steal looks and Jinyoung would look him up and down with a piercing gaze in the middle of a meeting, making Jaebum stutter and later kissing the living daylights out of him in a bathroom stall.

And actually, Mark probably suspected something; it was apparent in the look he gave Jinyoung every time he would return from a heated make-out session but neither of them actually mentioned it, whatever  _ it _ was. Jinyoung enjoyed  _ it _ , eventually letting Jaebum take him home and  _ take him _ in his bed, let himself be taken completely apart in Jaebum’s arms just to be put back together. Jaebum would then call a ride for him to take him back to Jackson’s apartment where he would be given a questioning stare but how could he even address something when he didn’t know what it was?

One time they tired themselves out far too much to get up again, so Jaebum would let him sleep over and Jinyoung would be the greatest liar if he said he didn’t love waking up next to him. On those days Jaebum would let him borrow a clean shirt and his cologne and Jinyoung thoroughly enjoyed having Jaebum’s scent on him for the rest of the day. He would even get a confused compliment from Youngjae who probably had no idea what was happening, even having the audacity to ask if he noticed that the chairman used the same brand of laundry detergent as him.

Jaebum, the chairman Im Jaebum eventually decided to make company dinners a weekly thing and began offering his employees to address him informally. But Jinyoung knew he enjoyed being called  _ Mr. Im _ in bed so he would let it slip up occasionally to throw him off.

Although Jaebum loved being rough with Jinyoung, after particularly hard days he liked to melt under Jinyoung’s touch and they would touch each other in the most loving way like if the other was to fall apart in any moment. And even though Jaebum didn’t want to admit it at first, Jinyoung slowly began to notice that the chairman was sometimes too tired of making decisions for the company and ordering around and he would let Jinyoung take complete control over him, letting himself be dominated and letting Jinyoung be rough with him and use him however he pleased.

Jaebum eventually found out that Jinyoung owned just a couple of discounted suits – Jinyoung started freaking out over a come stain on his jacket, almost lashing out at him for not being careful enough and Jaebum couldn’t understand why it was so serious,  _ it was just a jacket _ , but Jinyoung wasn’t having it, finally breaking down and admitting he had been saving up and didn’t want to waste his money just like that – so he brought him along to his personal tailor and Jinyoung reluctantly let Jaebum buy him nearly a dozen of high-end suits.

Jinyoung would never admit it, but being spoiled like that made him feel good, made him feel secure, made him feel like he  _ belonged _ to Jaebum. Gifts would randomly appear at his door and Jinyoung would always wonder how it was possible that Jaebum always knew what to get him, whether it was a new coffee maker (Jinyoung started showing up tired and unmotivated and Jaebum would ask Mark who would tell him that the coffee maker in Jackson’s apartment broke and neither of them had the time to repair it) or the newest iPhone when he accidentally broke his old one (it fell out of his pocket when Jaebum propped him up on the kitchen counter during one especially heated make-out session before work, but Jinyoung was too shy to admit it because what if Jaebum would want to be more careful after that?). 

Being careful was the last thing Jinyoung wanted from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo... what are we thinking? Did we like it? The little sprinkling of angst? Hah.
> 
> To be completely fair with you, I'm not entirely invested in this fic anymore. I started writing this a loong time ago when I got back into writing after a long hiatus. I'm still going to finish it, there's about a chapter worth of plot left, so expect it soon. Although I still love Got7 with all my heart and I have a weak spot for JJP, I'm probably going to focus more on Stray Kids or Ateez now.
> 
> With that, I hope that you enjoyed this chapter. Tell me in the comments! I love talking to all of you, it always makes my day <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confident. Domestic. Public.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo this is it! The last chapter! I hope I didn't take too long haha
> 
> Disclaimer that this chapter has an explicit sex scene. 
> 
> See you in the end notes!

Eventually, they started going out to lunches in multiple people, usually with Mark or Youngjae and occasionally even Yugyeom and Bambam – those two always came as an inseparable unit. Because of that, Jaebum was no longer able to pay for Jinyoung and of course, Jinyoung didn’t mind not having his meal paid for but there was something bittersweet about being forced back into their workplace dynamics, having to pretend they barely knew each other, that made Jinyoung yearn for  _ more _ .

This time it was all six of them including Jaebum but they were still waiting for Mark and Youngjae to arrive from the office. For how wearisome it felt having to hide their relationship Jinyoung found a certain kind of amusement in sneaking small touches under the table, from brushing his leg against Jaebum’s or Jaebum putting his palm on Jinyoung’s thigh, pushing his luck of what could pass unnoticed. 

“I’m pretty sure my landlord is homophobic,” Bambam suddenly exclaimed and for a second Jinyoung wasn’t completely sure that Bambam wasn’t referencing the fact that Jaebum’s fingers were slowly curling around the inside of Jinyoung’s thigh.

“Bam, your landlord wanting to raise rent doesn’t mean he’s homophobic,” Yugyeom laughed but Bambam shook his head.

“Why then do I have, like, no closet space at all? Now,  _ that _ is homophobic,” Bambam said but the smile tugging at his lips revealed that he wasn’t being all that serious.

Yugyeom laughed and Jinyoung heard Jaebum chuckle next to him as well. 

“Maybe you should–,” Yugyeom began but Bambam interrupted him immediately.

“If you say I should get rid of my clothes then I’m calling  _ you _ homophobic.”

“How could  _ I _ be homophobic,” Yugyeom whined, “just this morning I literally–”

There was a loud noise under the table, perhaps a sharp kick from Bambam into Yugyeom’s shin as he stopped in the middle of the sentence. The two of them exchanged a meaningful look and Jinyoung chuckled. 

“ _ Anyway, _ ” Bambam forced a smile, ignoring how Yugyeom’s face turned beet red. “I’m looking at new apartments and I wanted to ask around which area would you say is the best.”

“That depends on what you’re looking for,” Jaebum said offhandedly, his gaze buried in the menu.

“Well, I live in Ichon right now, so I was thinking something closer? Somewhere in Gangnam?”

“I heard that Daechi is pretty nice, but the rent will be crazy expensive,” Jinyoung noted and waved at Mark and Youngjae, who had just arrived.

“Oh, talking about apartments?” Mark asked as he sat down. “Are you looking for a new one already, Jinyoung?”

“No, Bambam is,” Jinyoung said offhandedly before he realized what Mark had actually said.

_ A new one, already? _

“W-wait, what?” He fixed Mark with a confused look. “What do you mean? Why would I be looking for a new apartment?”

Mark’s smile faltered and his eyes widened in shock. “Uh… So Jackson didn’t tell you…?”

Jinyoung’s chest tightened. “What didn’t he tell me?”

“Ah, now I feel stupid,” Mark muttered. “You should probably hear it from him first.”

“Mark, what is it?”

“Alright, well… He wants to move to Incheon.”

Jinyoung confronted Jackson as soon as he came home – this time skipping on inappropriate behaviour in the office after hours – however awkward it would be with Mark currently sitting on Jackson’s lap. He had felt awkward for the entirety of the day, avoiding Jaebum’s questioning stares during lunch, not quite ready to broach the topic of rent in Gangnam with Bambam either. He thought about it on the way home and then the entire time that he had to wait for Jackson to come back from work with Mark in tow.

Mark looked at him like if he was a wounded animal and Jinyoung hated it. It felt like the entire universe was laughing at Jinyoung’s poor attempt at dating, shoving the relationship of Jackson and Mark right into his face, reminding him of everything that his and Jaebum’s relationship wasn’t.

Confident. Domestic. Public.

“Look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier,” Jackson apologized before Jinyoung even had the chance to bring it up himself.

Jinyoung looked at him as he stuffed his face with kimchi fried rice. He raised his eyebrows in question.

“It’s just, we haven’t hung out in a long time and it felt awkward to just bring it up, I didn’t want to bother you with my problems and…”

“So, what’s in Incheon?”

Jackson sighed. “I applied for a job, about a month ago.”

“What?” Jinyoung almost spat out his food. Why would Jackson want to look for a different job when he had a stable position guaranteed for most of his life? “You mean, inside of the company?”

“Well, no,” Jackson hesitated. “It’s for a recording studio, based in Incheon.” 

When Jinyoung didn’t reply, he continued. “I honestly didn’t expect anything from it so I didn’t even look at the details and as it turns out, it’s almost a two-hour commute, not talking about the morning rush.”

Jinyoung stared at him with eyes wide, completely in shock. Jackson was about to give up the career that his family had insured for him to try to make it as a music producer.

“Well, I got the job and they told me that if it’s too far, I could work from home. But that assumes that I’d have a recording studio.”

“...Which you can’t have because the only spare room in this apartment is now my bedroom,” Jinyoung thought out loud.

Why did it feel so terrible? Why did his heart collapse on itself? This wasn’t the first time Jinyoung was forced to move.

“I still have about a month to make up my mind, I mean, I can still say no–”

“No, no, Jackson, you’re right,” Jinyoung said but it felt like the words coming out of his mouth had their own intention. “I should finally get back on my feet.”

_ Whatever that means right now.  _

The first person to catch Jinyoung and Jaebum in the act was Youngjae.

To Youngjae’s defence, Jinyoung knew that he should have been more careful and that it definitely was only his fault that he didn’t warn Jaebum that he heard the elevator ding, speechless from the way Jaebum’s tongue felt on the head of his cock.

The first warning sign was supposed to be just the fact that Youngjae was the last one to stay in the office along with Jinyoung. He wondered if perhaps he stayed overtime just to see what Jinyoung was up to in the evenings – after all, Jinyoung had used to be one of the first people to leave the office after the clock struck five.

“It’s almost eight, what are you still working on?” Youngjae asked him when he started to pack up, turning off his computer.

Jinyoung stretched out his arms and yawned. He had been looking at apartments for the past two hours. “I’m making up for last week,” he said as he switched the tabs to something work-related. It was partially the truth – sleeping at Jaebum’s place was way too comfortable for him to come to work on time and  _ his boss _ technically allowed it, so he had collected over eight hours of absence.

“Don’t overwork yourself,” Youngjae hummed. Jinyoung had always known that Youngjae was too trusting for his own good.

The next warning sign was Youngjae leaving his scarf on the office chair. It really should have crossed Jinyoung’s mind that his coworker would come back for it in the span of a couple of minutes but he barely noticed it, already walking to the chairman office the second the elevator doors closed after Youngjae. 

Maybe he should have taken his suit jacket with him and not leave it hanging on the back of his chair.

But he was already sitting on Jaebum’s desk, talking to him about how Jackson got the new job and about things completely unrelated when Youngjae came back to the office for his scarf.

The lamp on Jinyoung’s desk was still on but Jinyoung wasn’t there anymore and although it confused Youngjae for a second he didn’t ponder on it, turning off the lamp and reaching for his scarf. But then he noticed Jinyoung’s suit jacket too. It was suspicious – why would Jinyoung leave without his jacket?, Youngjae thought, assuming that Jinyoung had left right after him and that they somehow passed each other unnoticed.

So he did what he thought was the best – called Jinyoung.

Jinyoung’s phone vibrating on Jaebum’s table should had been the last warning sign but Jaebum was already on his knees, determined to make Jinyoung feel good after a stressful day at work.

Jinyoung had no idea why Youngjae then decided to walk right into the chairman office without knocking. Did he think that Jinyoung forgot his phone as well? Or did he want to say bye to his boss?

Either way, Jinyoung’s last mistake, now standing with his back to the entrance, was the fact that right after he heard Youngjae open the door, he only turned his head to look.

“Jinyoung? What are you doing here?” Youngjae laughed and right after that, multiple things happened at once.

Jinyoung realized that Youngjae, from his point of view, had no idea that Jaebum was kneeling right in front of Jinyoung with his dick in his mouth.

Jaebum realized only a second too late that somebody had entered the room, standing up to look the very moment Youngjae  _ realized _ .

Youngjae screamed,  _ loud, _ throwing his hands right in front of his face to shield himself from what he had just witnessed.

Jinyoung felt a wave of cold sweat wash right over him, all of the blood in his body shooting back up into his head, flushing his face deep red. 

And then Youngjae was turning away to run.

“I’m– I did  _ not _ just see  _ that _ ,” he muttered, loud enough for both Jinyoung and Jaebum to hear.

Jaebum exchanged a panicked gaze with Jinyoung as he helped him with his belt, Jinyoung’s hands trembling for the completely wrong reason.

“Oh my god, what the  _ fuck _ ,” Youngjae continued to himself and Jinyoung’s stomach dropped.

“Y-Youngjae,” Jinyoung finally collected himself and headed straight for the door to catch him. He was standing right outside the office, facing away from them.

“You don’t have to–” Youngjae began as Jinyoung caught his wrist, pulling him to look at him. “Actually, you do, please, do explain,” he refused to meet Jinyoung’s gaze, his face twisted in something that Jinyoung hoped wasn’t pure disgust.

“I– me and– well,” Jinyoung stumbled on his words – what even was there to explain?

“For how long have you been…” Youngjae gestured vaguely into the air.

Jinyoung took a deep breath. “Remember when the dating rumour broke out? That’s the day we kinda… got together.”

“Oh,” Youngjae hummed, his brows furrowed.

“It’s not like– we actually knew each other from college. It’s not… nepotism. Or anything.”

_ So what is it? _

Youngjae held his gaze, narrowing his eyes in distrust. 

“Are you… upset?”

“No,” he replied without a blink of an eye. “I’m just… thinking.”

“About?”

“Last Monday, when you came into work, Bambam stood right next to me and the second he saw you and Jaebum walk out of the elevator, he said, ‘They’re fucking. Hundred percent.’”

Youngjae laughed but Jinyoung didn’t find it very funny. “How many do you think… know?”

“Oh, no, not that many,” Youngjae tried to assure him. “I don’t think anyone else noticed and I didn’t believe Bambam anyway.”

By that time Jaebum made his way out of the office as well, leaning against the doorframe with one arm in the height of his head. Both Jinyoung and Youngjae looked at him expectantly. “Is everything okay?”

Jinyoung looked back at Youngjae who only shrugged. “I’m not sure how to… react to this.”

“Do you think you could,” Jaebum said, glancing at Jinyoung, “just keep this to yourself for some time?”

Youngjae agreed to not say anything and Jinyoung finally calmed down. Jaebum didn’t specify for how long he would have to keep it a secret and Youngjae didn’t ask, although that could have easily been just because of how awkward the whole situation was. Jinyoung didn’t blame him – he himself didn’t ask Jaebum for how long they would have to hide.

  
  


Jinyoung woke up to the sun rising slowly from behind the skyline of Seoul. The autumn had slowly turned into winter and the sky was crystal clear, letting the first rays of sunshine burn through the atmosphere straight into the penthouse bedroom. Jinyoung turned to his side to look at Jaebum, still sleeping peacefully next to him. He reached his hand to brush a stray strand of hair off his forehead and pressed a soft kiss into his hairline.

“Five more minutes,” Jaebum muttered with his eyes still closed and Jinyoung couldn’t help but smile. It was Saturday so they didn’t need to wake up early at all. Jaebum prefered to stay in for as long as possible, Jinyoung had found out.

“We don’t have to get up until the evening,” Jinyoung said as Jaebum pulled him closer to cuddle. 

Their relationship had started to grow domestic the more Jinyoung stayed over, sometimes for multiple days in a row and it felt  _ good, _ it felt  _ warm,  _ like home. 

“Oh,  _ good morning,” _ Jinyoung chuckled when Jaebum pressed their almost naked bodies together so their legs were tangled, pressing his crotch right against Jinyoung’s thigh. He was very obviously hard.

“I can’t help it,” Jaebum complained but proceeded to roll his hips forward again, letting out a long exhale. “And you can’t, either.”

Jaebum finally opened his eyes and their gazes met instantly. 

Suddenly his expression changed the slightest bit for Jinyoung to notice and with that his movements stilled, yet Jinyoung couldn’t properly decipher the emotion in his gaze. “I’m so lucky to have you here.”

Jinyoung lied completely speechless. How was he even supposed to react to that?

Jaebum chuckled, breaking the moment. “You look so cute when you don’t know what to say.”

“Sorry, I just–” Jinyoung managed, looking away and then back at him. “I’m pretty bad with emotions,” he chuckled shyly. It was the first time he admitted that out loud – he was pretty sure that Jackson had noticed but they had never talked about it openly.

_ You mean so much to me. _

“It’s alright, you don’t have to say anything. Say it when you’re ready. And until then just… stay with me?”

Jinyoung nodded before he could even realize it. There was so much emotion that he had repressed, pushed to the back of his mind so it wouldn’t spill out every time he opened his mouth to talk to him he wasn’t sure how to suddenly speak out and voice the thoughts that he had running through his head for the past couple of months. He wasn’t sure how to  _ trust, _ how to just hand over his heart and be sure that Jaebum wouldn’t break it.

“You’re thinking too much.” Jinyoung snapped out of his thoughts and noticed that Jaebum had closed his eyes, looking like he would fall asleep at any moment.

So Jinyoung kissed him, gently at first but when Jaebum returned the kiss he dove deeper, pouring the emotions he couldn’t name into the way he captured his lips and licked into his mouth. He held Jaebum’s face in his hands and slowly moved closer to him. Jaebum held his waist as he straddled his hips, mere centimetres from grinding against him. They were both only in their underwear so Jinyoung could drag his fingers all over Jaebum’s bare torso and the mere sight excited him, already half hard from the thought of getting ruined by the man below him. 

“You’re so good to me,” Jinyoung whispered when Jaebum pulled him closer by the waist, pressing their crotches together to generate at least some friction. 

They kissed again, more desperate this time, needy for physical contact. Jinyoung sucked at Jaebum’s bottom lip, biting it slightly as Jaebum moaned quietly, fingers digging into Jinyoung’s sides to pull him even closer. He palmed at his butt, squeezing it softly as they continued to grind against each other.

“Want you,” Jinyoung muttered against his mouth and slid a hand down his torso to press down gently onto the bulge in his underwear and Jaebum nearly whined at the contact so he continued, feeling himself almost painfully hard just from the moans alone.

“Off,” Jaebum managed and Jinyoung immediately got the cue, helping Jaebum out of his underwear before undressing himself as well. Before he could even decide what to do next Jaebum pinned him to the mattress, holding him by his wrists so he couldn’t move. Then he dipped down to drag his tongue all the way from the sensitive spot on his neck to the earlobe, biting and sucking at all the places that drove Jinyoung mad.

“Ahh…  _ touch me, _ please,” he whined at the lack of other contact and Jaebum immediately obeyed, sliding his hands down his body before stopping at his waist. He lowered himself so he was facing Jinyoung’s cock, hard and red against his abdomen. He looked back up at Jinyoung who watched him the entire time with lust in his eyes, cheeks flushed pink and hair tousled from sleep and from the intense make-out session, so he took the opportunity and stuck his tongue out to lick around the tip of his cock while maintaining eye contact, earning a stifled moan that only encouraged him more. He sucked around the head before he took his entire length into his mouth it hit the back of his throat and he almost gagged, but instead he bobbed his head up and down until Jinyoung was a whining mess and Jaebum himself let out moans around the cock in his mouth, satisfied with how much Jinyoung filled him up.

“So pretty,” Jaebum muttered when he pulled off, his hand replacing his lips to jerk him slowly. Jinyoung moaned in response and Jaebum took him back into his mouth. His hand was now covered in saliva so he slowly moved it to circle around Jinyoung’s rim, earning a surprised gasp. He glanced up to see his reaction, halting his movements in case Jinyoung was uncomfortable, but when he saw Jinyoung with his eyes closed and mouth gaping open in pleasure he resumed his movements before Jinyoung was opening his legs even more for easier access.

“Stay still,” he ordered him and reached to the bedside table for the bottle of lube that he kept there. He drizzled some onto his fingers as Jinyoung watched him closely. Before moving further he leaned down to kiss Jinyoung and it wasn’t a needy kiss, it didn’t even feel sexual despite the circumstances, it felt like –  _ love. _

The moment didn’t last long though as Jaebum was moving again, sliding one finger slowly past his entrance. Jinyoung took a deep breath to relax and then Jaebum was taking his length into his mouth again, swallowing and licking around it to distract him with pleasure before sliding in a second finger and scissoring them carefully. It didn’t take long for Jinyoung to start moaning again, the warmth around his cock and the stretch way too good for him to stay silent. He grasped the sheets around him as Jaebum started fucking his fingers in and out of him, adding a third finger in the process and Jinyoung was glad that they were in a penthouse apartment otherwise there would be neighbours knocking at their door, complaining about the noise. 

“Look at you, so gorgeous,” Jaebum muttered but Jinyoung could barely register it. 

“Mhm, feels  _ so good, _ please…” he replied, pausing to moan when Jaebum hit a particularly sensitive spot. “ _ Please, _ f-fuck me,  _ Jaebum,” _ he whined and who was Jaebum to say no when Jinyoung sounded desperate like this?

So he pulled out his fingers and sat between Jinyoung’s thighs. He drizzled some more lube onto his cock and was about to grab Jinyoung’s hips to pull him closer when he was interrupted.

“No, wait,” Jinyoung sat up. “Wanna ride you,” he breathed out and Jaebum sat down against the headboard to accommodate him while Jinyoung straddled his hips and supported himself on Jaebum’s shoulders. He kissed Jaebum, hard and desperate before attaching his mouth onto his neck as he slowly lined himself up with Jaebum’s cock. 

With one last kiss, he started to sink down onto him and Jaebum nearly hit his head on the headboard as he moaned in pure pleasure, his fingers digging into Jinyoung’s thighs as he finally bottomed out.

“Fuck,  _ Jinyoungie,” _ he moaned, waiting for him to start moving. The warmth around his cock felt irresistible and there was nothing he wanted more than to just throw Jinyoung on his back and fuck into him relentlessly, to fuck him until he was screaming his name, to  _ ruin him _ he wouldn’t even be able to walk for the rest of the day. But he held back and watched the man in front of him as he got used to the girth of his cock. “ _ Mine.” _

Jinyoung’s eyes snapped open but Jaebum didn’t even flinch.  _ Mine. _

The word resonated in his head as he habitually tried to push down his emotions again before he lifted himself up the slightest amount to slide back down onto Jaebum’s cock and it felt good, so good in ways that no one has ever made him feel and looking down into his eyes only increased the pleasure so he continued to move until it was too much and he found himself nodding.

“Y-yours,” he muttered against his lips and Jaebum kissed him, perhaps it was a reward for answering or maybe it was an affirmation but regardless Jinyoung pulled off his dick almost completely before sinking down completely and Jaebum moaned loud into his mouth Jinyoung could barely contain himself, the simple word  _ mine _ echoing in his mind like a song stuck inside his head.

“I’m…” Jaebum tried but Jinyoung cut him off with another roll of his hips. “I’m  _ yours.” _

And suddenly he couldn’t keep pushing his emotions down anymore, they were overflowing and clouding his vision and there was no way he was able to hold it all in so for the first time in his life he let go. Jinyoung was  _ his _ . Their eyes met again and Jinyoung couldn’t help a smile that spread on his lips as he nodded again and Jaebum’s hand cradled his face, thumb swiping across his cheek and Jinyoung didn’t even realize he was crying.

“You okay?” Jaebum asked when Jinyoung’s movements slowed down so he resumed, drawing a series of moans out of him.

“Feels so good,” Jinyoung muttered. “You feel so good, wanna be– wanna be yours,  _ fuck, _ so much,  _ please.” _

Why did it suddenly feel so liberating to let go? To let his emotions free, to let someone see him so clearly, without the cold facade?

_ Jinyoung was his. _

Jaebum flipped them around and before Jinyoung’s back even met the mattress Jaebum was already pounding into him, Jinyoung’s legs wrapped around his back to hold him close in the best angle possible. With every movement Jaebum’s cock brushed against his prostate and Jinyoung couldn’t stop himself from moaning, realizing that Jaebum was going to make him come without touching his cock at all.

“So beautiful and mine, baby,  _ fuck,” _ Jaebum almost groaned and Jinyoung felt himself edge closer and closer.

Why did Jinyoung ever feel the need to hide? He liked Jaebum, he  _ adored him _ , he wanted nothing but to be close to him, nothing but to be  _ completely his. _

“Gonna come,” Jaebum suddenly slowed down but Jinyoung only canted his hips up to encourage him.

“Come inside,” Jinyoung heard himself say, hardly keeping himself from coming. “Want you inside.”

Jaebum moaned, a quiet ‘fuck’ escaping his lips before thrusting into Jinyoung once again, hitting his prostate right on. “Gonna fill you up,” he said, kissing and biting the skin on his collarbones. “Fill you up good.”

“Mhm, yeah– make me yours,” Jinyoung said and Jaebum snapped his hips forward, coming with a moan that was barely suppressed by Jinyoung’s shoulder, face twisted in pleasure and then suddenly Jinyoung was coming as well, painting his stomach white and moaning what was supposed to be Jaebum’s name but came out as a series of whines as Jaebum rode out his orgasm. 

Jaebum collapsed on top of Jinyoung and although it wasn’t the most pleasant thing, neither of them objected to the stickiness between them, a mixture of come and sweat almost glueing them together. 

Eventually it was Jaebum who got up to get a tissue and clean them up, gently kissing the skin that he had previously bitten. Jinyoung was way too spent to move so he only curled onto his side and watched Jaebum with sleepy eyes. 

“What?” Jaebum eventually asked after discarding the dirty tissues and lying down next to him.

“Mhm, nothing,” Jinyoung muttered. Jaebum didn’t press on, instead shifting closer so their noses were touching. He brushed the hair out of his forehead and stroked his cheek gently. Jinyoung closed his eyes and felt himself starting to fall asleep, slowly and gently as he fell in love with Jaebum.

“Of course I’m yours,” Jaebum answered the unspoken question. Jinyoung felt him press a soft kiss on his forehead. “For as long as you’ll want me.”

  
  


“How’s apartment hunt going?” Jaebum asked at one point as Jinyoung laid next to him, already awake yet still tired.

“Haven’t really started yet,” Jinyoung muttered from the sleepy haze.

A beat of silence. Jinyoung opened his eyes to make sure Jaebum didn’t fall asleep.

“Why?’

“Well,” Jaebum started, averting his eyes to the ceiling. “If you wanted to, you could stay here.”

Jinyoung’s eyes shot open. The situation felt oddly familiar, similar to when Jackson had offered his extra bedroom, but Jinyoung had a feeling that Jaebum wasn’t talking about such an arrangement.

“I’m not pressuring you to do anything, I just thought…” Jaebum shortly met Jinyoung’s gaze but looked away. “If Jackson moves to Incheon, you could move in with me.”

Jinyoung blinked at Jaebum, not sure if he was hearing properly. He wasn’t even confident to call Jaebum  _ his _ until that morning yet Jaebum was already considering them living together. 

“Ah, I hope I didn’t scare you now,” Jaebum muttered.

“No, no, you– it’s fine, I just didn’t expect…”

Was he so much in his head with worry that he didn’t notice Jaebum reciprocating his feelings?

“You don’t have to decide right away, I just–“

_ Was I so focused on not letting Jaebum notice my feelings that I completely ignored his? _

“No, I  _ do _ want to.”

Jaebum blinked, mouth ajar before a tiny smile appeared on his lips.

“I would really like that,” Jinyoung nodded. “I’m not sure how much of the rent I can afford, but…”

“Don’t even think about paying rent,” Jaebum chuckled. “I own this place. The only thing you have to pay is attention to me.”

”Cheesy,” Jinyoung cringed but couldn’t help a laugh.

“You love it,” Jaebum leaned forward to capture his lips in a soft kiss.

“Mm,” Jinyoung pretended to think about it. “Yeah. I do.”

Jaebum kissed him again. “So you could try out living here with me and if you like it, by the time Jackson moves out you would already have a place for yourself. I can set you up with your own office here if you wanted a little bit more privacy. Anything, I can make it happen.”

“That’s a… wow, I don’t know how to thank you enough. I don’t want to be a bother…”

“You’re not a bother,” Jaebum interrupted him. “I would love to have you around.”

Jinyoung’s heart skipped a beat. How was Jaebum still able to do that?

“This place is too big for me anyway,” he said, almost as an afterthought.

  
  


“We’re going to be late,” Jinyoung whined, nervously shifting his weight from one leg to the other while watching Jaebum do his hair for what felt like hours.

“It’s a charity gala, no one will care,” he hummed, focused on the mirror in front of him. Apparently Jaebum got invited to a bunch of fancy black-tie events every year and despite trying to donate to the fundraisers, he usually tried to avoid the event itself. Today was an exception as he had promised to attend to an important business partner. “And trust me, these are boring. You will be glad that you missed the beginning.”

It didn’t calm Jinyoung very much. After all, it was the very first event that he would attend officially as an employee of Daeim and he really didn’t want to mess it up, however impossible Jaebum was telling him it was. He wasn’t completely sure why had Jaebum invited him to accompany him, there were many other employees and managers that were much more fitting for the occasion and actually knew something about the company and its business. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Jaebum repeated as if he could read his thoughts. 

“I’m not,” Jinyoung lied, fixing the cufflinks on a shirt that Jaebum had gotten him tailored.

It was already completely dark outside when they left Jaebum’s apartment –  _ their apartment _ – in Jaebum’s favourite Bentley. Leaving the apartment in one of Jaebum’s cars became almost a routine and Jinyoung even started to become friends with the chauffeurs. Since the dating rumours, they only ever went through the private underground garages where the press couldn’t take pictures or keep count of how many times Jinyoung had visited. Jinyoung wondered for how long he would have to hide behind the tinted glass of expensive cars, but he was very much willing to do so for the rest of his life if it meant staying with Jaebum.

“It’s snowing,” he said as the car slowed down in the driveway to the venue. Jaebum looked out of the window on Jinyoung’s side to see for himself and then their eyes met. There was a spark in Jaebum’s eyes that drew him close and a sudden urge to kiss him senseless nearly overpowered him before he realized where they were. 

Jaebum took his hand and Jinyoung realized he had spaced out. “What are you thinking about?”

“Nothing,” he muttered before receiving a dirty look. “Just nervous about the event.”

“It will be fine,” Jaebum assured him for what felt like the millionth time that day. “Just stay by my side and I will do the talking. We’ll meet some of my business partners, listen to a few talks and then go home.”

The car eventually stopped completely and Jaebum squeezed Jinyoung’s hand to stop him when he wanted to open the car door – there were valets outside to do that for him. So he waited briefly for the door to be opened and then stepped out of the car as graciously as possible in the fitted suit. He thought about Jaebum calling the apartment  _ home _ and how naturally it felt for him to call it like that as well. 

He walked around the car to meet Jaebum on the other side by the entrance to the lavish building. There were photographers everywhere, pointing their cameras at the two of them and Jinyoung didn’t dare to look into any of the black holes, staring at him like predators stalk its prey.

“Are you ready?” Jaebum said and extended his hand towards him, the palm facing upwards. It looked inviting and Jinyoung almost reached for it before stopping himself.

“What– You want to… ?” Jinyoung stuttered, looking at the hand in front of him. He felt a thin layer of sweat break out on the back of his neck under the bright flashing lights of cameras all around them.

“If you don’t mind then I’m ready,” he said and Jinyoung realized that just as the hand looked inviting in front of him, it could also still be interpreted as a beckoning for them to walk further.

“I thought– I’m here as an employee? What about the whole scandal thing?” Jinyoung muttered so no one else but Jaebum could hear him.

Jaebum exhaled and made a step towards him. He met his eyes with a look that comforted Jinyoung instantly without even making physical contact. “You’re here as… my plus one,” he said quietly so only Jinyoung would hear him. “I was never really bothered by the press and what they think about me or my family. They’re nosy, they try to get in other people’s business and they talk constantly, but what’s the real harm, hm?”

“But what about… what about back then?” Jinyoung felt the world around him spin as Jaebum made one more step towards him and took both of his hands. The cameras flashed around them like a field of cicadas in summer, the night suddenly as bright as a day.

“Well, they thought we were dating and… we were not. And I had no idea how you felt about me so I was worried you would quit or something, get upset and never talk to me again because I ruined your career by dragging you into the spotlight. But now… if you are willing, we can stop hiding.”

“But you’re still my boss, isn’t it the same?”

Jaebum shook his head. “I made some changes and reorganized the department. I promoted Youngjae to be the section manager so he’s now your boss. Not me. It felt odd, anyway.”

“Since… since when?”

“It’s been now a week on paper and it will take some time for everything to get sorted and for all of the responsibilities to be handed over, but it’s no less official.” Jaebum watched Jinyoung’s reaction but when he didn’t get any response, he continued.

“Listen, I know it’s a lot. As much as I love hiding in my office and being all sneaky with our late-night dates I also don’t want to hide forever when all I want to do is for everyone to know how much I – care about you.”

Jinyoung met his eyes as his heart stammered inside of his chest, beating so violently he could barely hear anything else.

_ Fuck what the world thinks. _

The snow fell around them quietly, little snowflakes melting right upon impact on their expensive suits and for that moment it was only the two of them and the snow. Jinyoung noticed a couple of snowflakes gently sitting on Jaebum’s carefully styled hair and smiled at how soft it made him look.

“Sure, the press will have a field day and it might get awkward when we come into work on Monday but none of that matters because, in the end, I’m confident in being…” Jaebum chuckled and Jinyoung noticed a blush on his cheeks. “Your boyfriend?”

Jinyoung felt the world stop suddenly and then he smiled and smiled until his cheeks hurt but it was all fine because Jaebum was in front of him and  _ his. _

“So, what about you?”

_ Are you confident in being my boyfriend? _

Jinyoung laughed because had there ever been a simpler answer?

_ Confident. Domestic. Public. _ He remembered wishing for those. 

He nodded. “Yeah,” he breathed out.

The cameras were still going off and the noise didn’t seem to go down either but for once, Jinyoung didn’t care.

_ I love you, _ he thought as Jaebum took his hand properly.

They turned in the direction of the entrance to walk inside and Jinyoung felt his hand being squeezed lightly.

_ I love you, too. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh so how did you like it?? I really tried to give them the happy ending they deserved. Let me know in the comments how you liked the story! What were your favourite scenes? Anything you would like to see more of in fanfics? 
> 
> Also, there's a little easter egg - the scene where Youngjae catches them in the act was heavily inspired by a very similar scene from an American TV show - I wonder if someone recognized it! Let me know in the comments if you have a guess!
> 
> Anyway, I would like to thank everyone who's made the time to read this fic, it has a very special place in my heart because it got me back into writing after a 2 year long hiatus. And big thanks to everyone who left a comment, those really helped me in moments that I was losing motivation. I love you all <3

**Author's Note:**

> Talk to me on [instagram](https://www.instagram.com/woosanthighs/) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/wooyngthighs) !
> 
> [Wattpad account](https://www.wattpad.com/user/wooyoungthighs) (this is my only Wattpad account; if you find my work elsewhere, please report it)


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